Constructive euphemisms?

The term Aspergers is suddenly Useful in that NT individuals don't quite know what to do with it. For some reason it's acquired such strange specifications that seem particularly odd, Neurotypicals can't identify. Where as Spectrum becomes Spectrummy, Autistic = we're all a little... it's like Virtue Signalling with Imposter Syndrome or some other nonsense construct NTs use to play a redundant echo chamber of we-are-one-but-I'm-attempting-micro-domination. 

I've found it useful to see brain scans and understand the neurological side of Autism. If the brain is making hyper calculations and utilising different lobes for reasoning rather than the typical use of the one for language and feelings, then most likely it might take a little longer to output. I use the analogy of my brain being like a messy library often and my somewhat difficult attempts at accessing. Or describing the difference between NT and Autistic/ADHD wiring like attempting to exit an Escape Room. The NT has one obstacle which they just walk around. But for the other, it's like a new puzzle needs solving and removing with every step. 

I really think there's a noticeable difference when attempting to use social constructs. I've opted to simply state when NTs are being nebulous or odd. The problem is, most can't usually understand just how encoded they are: Sublimated... Oedipalised. 

  I've heard it both ways. In the former, it was probably fairly well intended. But as the latter takes almost an opposite stance with the same words, the former is probably ill-advised if the speaker wishes to demonstrate some degree of solidarity. So best avoided altogether, perhaps. Now, how can we make some sort of euphemised admission to try & avoid eliciting it either way. I'm still sticking with either 'slow' or 'some neural damage', at the moment.

I think I've got it, thank you. Yes, it does irritate me when people make that remark. But  it has nothing to do with the surface meaning of the words, but everything to do with their sub-text.

Everyone's a little bit autistic. (I have some of these traits myself or ones similar to them. And I know lots of other people who have them too. We're only just beginning to understand Autism and I wouldn't be surprised if one day it comes out that it's more common a condition that we assumed). 

Everyone's a little bit autistic. (Stop making excuses, you lazy malingerer. We all have problems and we all need support so there's no reason why you should be getting any special treatment.) 

Yes, there are similarities in processing. There are also similarities in politics; which is why a UK response in this day and age might not differ that significantly from a response here. We live in times of populist denial, in both places. 

Perhaps there is a double whammy effect. I have taught ESOL myself, but I suppose I personally have quite a few problems with other languages; and that could be attributed to slowness, ADHD, autism/asperger's or just plain old-fashioned neural damage. (There is some evidence of the latter - another reason why I don't always want to keep using last-year's labels.) It could just be that 'slowness' is as good a 'fit' as any.

Cheers!

I'm listening. It is probably so prevalent that frequently we are failing to really communicate with people who have very very similar issues. When I first started out on this new 'occupation', I too was not greatly troubled by those six words; and I also admitted to a few people in the UK that I thought those six words had some validity in my experience of both NT and ND ways. But now I'm back in another country where even those six words might be too big a step for most subject specialists to make; and so most adults with autism here would normally live a rather solitary and silenced life. They may also have never been properly informed about their condition. Now, how can we break down a few more of the barriers, in order to create a slightly more constructive environment?

One might sum it up as "looking for satisfactory personal strategies to counteract the current indifference of the modern-day majority to ANY minority issue". If you are struggling to understand my muddled reasoning, then I guess that it might be better to just start again from that summary, and then perhaps respond in any way that you personally find worthwhile. (And that would include "pass".) But obviously, pick a good day for it, and I will pick a good day to respond, if a response seems appropriate. ;-) 

I'm looking for ways to ensure that I too am at least sometimes heard. In my current circumstances, if I make any attempt to communicate the essence of my fairly long and solitary life, that communication goes no where. In effect, most listeners (including family) just reach for the OFF switch. So our daily communication never really goes much further than "Pass the sauce please". The obvious NT (and perhaps even ND) conclusion to this very long-term communication breakdown is that I am probably way past my sell-by date. (My own conclusion too.) However, I am not the easiest person to just give up on a complete life's experience. So here I am looking for a few new and amusing ways to elicit some sort of constructive response. But the main thing here is that solemnity is not really required.

I tend to talk in euphemisms because I have long found that almost no one is really in favour of a more direct delivery. Life is a performance art, I suppose, and I'm not the greatest stand-up comedian. I guess that is why I refer to myself as 'slow'. I find it works much more satisfactorily than the more usual labels. But a few other alternative explanations would undoubtedly help my schtick. Well, I have a couple more already. That's good!

Wasn't it Lorna Wing herself that said something along the lines of autism and autistic traits being for more prevalent than we think? I'm not really fussed about the 'we're all a bit autistic' thing as it's likely to be correct. It may depend, for me, on the context and who's saying it but generally I find it a thoughtful response to make me feel included.

So you are living in a different country but English is your first language? I teach people who live in the UK whose first language is not English and have quite a few "foreign" friends. I feel there are some similarities between how we process things.

Do you feel like you have a double whammy of autism + some language barriers? Do you feel your autism fits in better because of this? Sorry, just being curious. You don't have to answer! 

This looks like a really interesting post, but I've read it twice and still can't get a grasp on what it's about. That said, today has been a very stressful day so perhaps my brain isn't taking in information properly.

Cheers! I doubt that would work for me, though; as I will better explain below. ;-) in the UK order of things, I might just be stating the completely obvious, but not so here. (And if it is still a bit too obvious, I can only say that this is the way I continue to think as a fully-paid up member of the bungled & botched. There won't be any apologies for that.

I fully intend to road-test a few 'oblique justifications' for my lifelong behaviour, in order to keep my mind active during lock-down; because it is blindly obvious that I am never going to be allowed to express them in a more direct manner. I'm not in the UK. I'm a long-term expat, far abroad.

As I sort of indicated above, I seem to be more than a bit AD(H)D, but without so much H. So I would be saying here something like I can't keep up with the normal speed of local mental processing, and their renowned multitasking ability. I don't necessarily have that much difficulty with practical tasks (I have quite a few manual and mental skills). I prefer to work on projects in a fairly solitary manner. And when people put me under pressure from multiple standpoints, I really can't handle it. And it is almost like people revel in being able to expose that 'weakness' so easily. If you like, it seems that they are using my 'weakness' to underline their perception of themselves as somehow far superior to incomers such as myself. But that is something that my largely solitary-working self will never really quite go along with; even though I definitely prefer NOT to air my issues in public here.

My partner would say she lives in a team-working culture, but my own idea is that there are certain people in that 'team' who really don't do much more team-working than putting intense pressure on lower status others to do all the real grunt work. And they really do not like any real form of occupational backchat. And so I inevitably have to be fairly subtle in the way I express my occasional difficulties. For instance, I'm never going to use the A word here, because ever admitting you are an adult autistic here is like putting yourself completely beyond the pale. For adult team members to even suggest that they might be autistic, would be to disrespect those higher status people who could quite easily be perceived as  'autistic' themselves, but which they will never admit, because it would lead to instant loss of (the all important) 'face'. As a low-income expat here, I am basically very low on the social ladder, and too much obvious critical thinking from myself would probably lead to my expulsion.

So it is extremely difficult to really get one's points over here; but I suppose I might just as well have a bit of fun attempting to do just that in a roundabout manner.

Thanks! Yes, that sounds rather like something I quite often say to my partner. Indeed, there might be more truth in that than some of my earlier examples. I have obvious problems with processing in noisy and confusing environments; such as the one in which I live. Far more distractions than the UK for instance. But as a real local, she finds it extremely hard to understand this line. However, the idea that I might perhaps be on the spectrum was completely untenable, so the processing speed argument made a good standpoint to retreat to. I too can be remarkably 'quick' on some things, but they are not the sort of things that most 'modern-day' working people (both UK & here) really appreciate; so overall, I just prefer to say 'slow' for convenience sake.

Not road-tested yet, but it might go something like...

NT: Why can't you just do X ?

Me: because I'm an autist and it's difficult for me.

NT: Well we're all a little bit autistic aren't we? Just get on with it.

Me:  <menacing tone, furious eyelid twitching> maybe... but for me it's pathological.

NT: <laughs nervously and sidles off>

Something which I've taken to telling myself is "it takes me a while to process..." I think I've said this aloud to others. I don't know how accurate it actuslly is.  It's a bit more vague though. I don't know if I'd be happy saying I'm a bit slow. I'm actually quite quick on a lot of things which is why people are surprised when I tell them I'm on the spectrum.

I think when people say "we are all a bit..." they're trying to help normalise things. But when i dont feel normal, their sentiments don't match up with what I believe.