Constructive euphemisms?

The usual deal is, of course, that you try to tell someone what you have recently discovered for yourself , and you get back the standard, " We're all a bit  *****". I personally can't think of a single case when it has really helped me for someone to say that; except perhaps when admitting it to myself or the diagnostician/assessor. So how could we phrase it some other way to disarm that reaction before it even begins to happen. I've taken, online, to just calling myself ''a bit slow''; as in 'Well, you know me, I've always been a bit slow off the mark". That does have a certain grain of truth in it, in my case; and I just sort of figure that their reaction is either then going to be something like, 'Well, I suppose I have might just have similar issues myself", or they are going to clam up completely, to avoid feeling uncomfortable.

You know, when you are young, nearly everyone one believes it is their god-given right to be completely and devastating candid about what they think YOUR problem is; while the exact same people when older will basically backpedal on all the scorn they offered you in your younger years. In their rush to be the quickest off the mark in the monetarist olympics of life, I can't really imagine anyone really wanting to say, "Well, we are all a bit slow sometimes''. And yet in my case, there is a grain of truth in it.

I've also been trying out 'neural damage'; as I can see how it might well have happened as a result of childhood sickness; and I have no real compunction about saying this about myself; why worry yourself about those fairly neutral words when the damage was obviously done decades ago. And I doubt whether too many people would then wish to contest such a blunt statement by citing a few of their own minor neurological issues.

But how about other 'alt' ways to relabel your life as something just a little bit different from the much maligned ASD/Asperger's thing? I'm just wondering if someone here might be able to come up with some real scorchers, to hex the  "We're all a bit  *****" bs; something that will make the listener go away for a while and ponder why you didn't come straight out with some stereotyped label that they could instantly and easily be dismissive of. I look forward to perhaps trying a few of your suggestions out; almost anything would be better that the complete silence that usually follows  "We're all a bit  *****".

But seriously, I can see myself enjoying this. I have found the ''a bit slow'' label a fairly constructive one, over the decades. It is something that can be later elaborated on, at length; or it can get people wondering why you didn't immediately use one of the more current 'labels'.

But I also wouldn't be too surprised if some folk think this is a dreadful idea. I'd still like to hear why! :-) If so, how else could one disarm the usual hackneyed NT response? I think I'm looking more for cheerful strategies, rather than sullen upheaval.

Parents
  • Wasn't it Lorna Wing herself that said something along the lines of autism and autistic traits being for more prevalent than we think? I'm not really fussed about the 'we're all a bit autistic' thing as it's likely to be correct. It may depend, for me, on the context and who's saying it but generally I find it a thoughtful response to make me feel included.

  • I'm listening. It is probably so prevalent that frequently we are failing to really communicate with people who have very very similar issues. When I first started out on this new 'occupation', I too was not greatly troubled by those six words; and I also admitted to a few people in the UK that I thought those six words had some validity in my experience of both NT and ND ways. But now I'm back in another country where even those six words might be too big a step for most subject specialists to make; and so most adults with autism here would normally live a rather solitary and silenced life. They may also have never been properly informed about their condition. Now, how can we break down a few more of the barriers, in order to create a slightly more constructive environment?

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  • I'm listening. It is probably so prevalent that frequently we are failing to really communicate with people who have very very similar issues. When I first started out on this new 'occupation', I too was not greatly troubled by those six words; and I also admitted to a few people in the UK that I thought those six words had some validity in my experience of both NT and ND ways. But now I'm back in another country where even those six words might be too big a step for most subject specialists to make; and so most adults with autism here would normally live a rather solitary and silenced life. They may also have never been properly informed about their condition. Now, how can we break down a few more of the barriers, in order to create a slightly more constructive environment?

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