Adult haircutting experiences

I've always found other people washing my hair uncomfortable. It seems to pull and hurt. I thought that was normal. May be not.

Biggest irritant for me is the small talk. Hair dressers seem to have a pathological need to know whether you are going out tonight, whether you have a boyfriend and where you are going on holiday. Why? I take a book and ignore my surroundings.

You're very wise. People do tend to get very frustrated if you just ignore them. They probably don't really enjoy talking about mowing the lawn, or boring people's holidays lying on a beach in the sun with strangers either, and knowing they don't have to could be nice for them. Hairdressers can be autistic too, too.

I browse the interweb to find the haircut I want and show the hairdresser the photo.  If I like the resulting haircut - I take selfies to show them next time.

If someone is going to be up close and in my personal space, I'm much more relaxed if they appear female.

RE: Talkative hairdressers

After showing the photo and answering any questions about it, I tell them I'd rather relax than talk and close my eyes. I've never noticed any negative response to this.

I don't like going for a hair cut, mainly because I would have to phone or go and talk to a receptionist to get an appointment. And then I stress about communicating how I want it to look. They always try to put you at ease by making small talk, which I find difficult and embarrassing. Although I do really like the feeling of having my hair washed.

I cut my own hair a few weeks ago and it was easier than I expected so I will probably keep doing that from now on because it is cheaper and less stressful.

The basement area barbers used to share the area with the men's toilet, which closed about twenty years ago.  It was left for toilet, right for barbers.  It had a great atmosphere and smell of urine.  Barbers were all smoking and sometimes drinking.

And the moulting too... when my hair is too long, it ends up everywhere! Even taking a shower causes a major shedding.

I'm much prefer the sounds of the French language, or an American accent to a British one, but the minimum is that it has to be all the same language (or accent). 

I don't even like walking around listening to music in public. Probably doesn't help that I now work in the field of sexual violence so I'm becoming even more cautious about my personal safety. 

If I get some Loop plugs I'll let you know. I've not been going anywhere recently so I've not bothered worrying about it too much.

These are really great tips, thank you. I must admit I hadn't thought about planning out these details beforehand and making requests in advance.

I have a fascination and love of long hair!

I literally just ticked off a bucket list item - growing my hair as long as I could - because of this! Sadly, the only thing stopping me from growing it longer was the sensory stuff - it would get trapped anywhere and everywhere, I couldn't really rest without having to check where it was. I miss the length, but I don't miss the neck aches and hair pulls. I'm also mesmerised by long hair and how it moves!

Quiet hair stylists are like gold! Especially the calm ones.

I just realised that the last time I went to my hair dresser I was the only customer there and don't remember background noise. This time there was also a radio on and another customer & hair dresser with multiple convos going at any one time across the floor, plus phone calls, the front door bell (a literal hanging bell), etc. Makes sense now that it was even more sensory stuff than before, on top of it being after a long break!

I actually like when people speak in a language I don't know - I have an excuse to not listen and not pick up on cues!! Some cultures are also more clear and frank with their language - For e.g. I find some English people can be the worst at not saying what they really mean. It's like an art how they can dance around a topic without mentioning what it is! I can honestly appreciate this art... as long as I'm only a spectator (listener) on the outside haha!

Wow beautiful entrance - I'd want to go in and explore! (Separately to the hair cutting / people'ing experience!) Love the way you described it.

M said:

Loop

I wonder if the Loop ones are the ones with the big rings that are more visible? I spotted them a while back. Love to hear how you find them if you decide to get some.

M said:

My children might start feeling completely unloved and ignored if I start wearing actual ear plugs. Tempting though.

I LOL'ed about ear plugs & your children haha! 

but it does put me into my own world and i have to watch out

Yes - this is why I worry about complete sound blocking. It's good when static, but not so good in a changing environment of any kind.

I love that length of hair. Hair length is a weird autistic quirk of mine.  Touching hair, feeling its texture and smelling its aroma. 

I have a fascination with long hair!

Things that worked for me:

Finding a small quiet barber and going there at their least busy time (ie if it's packed just don't go in)

Always going to the same one - and they really don't mind if you ask to wait for the person you know.

Take a picture of what you want (maybe of yourself from when you liked your hair?!)

That's all out of the window now as I decided to grow my hair from crew-cut down to my shoulders and I haven't had it cut for 2.5 years (and have moved town). I am massively not looking forward to a totally new experience...

barbers is owned by a person i know from my wing chun classes so made it easier like that. although first 1 or 2 times i went i had plenty to talk about and appear normal. last time i went i had nothing to talk about so i kinda felt awkward like she probably thought i was silent treatmenting her. this is usually what happens tbh, i always have things to talk about with a person at first but when i know them theres nothing to talk about no more.

dont really care about hair cut tbh... i usually go to barbers once a year so my look varies from short neat hair to shoulder length jesus hair lol

used to have a mobile hairdresser who now i compare to others i realise she was pretty bad. she used to pretty much lift me off the chair by my hair she was so rough and he scissors where rusty and blunt so you feel a twang and a plucking of your hair most of the time and it was a bit stressful.... oh and she also ended up missing somehow and stabbing the scissors into my neck one time, which lucky they are so blunt that they didnt pierce the skin due to how blunt they are haha she also cut my dads ear one time too.... god mobile hairdressers are aweful.... i go to a barbers now and its total difference, no twanging of the hair, its pleasant all the way through, no needing to lift you up by your hair too as they have chairs they can pump up and down.

I hate my hair being touched. Had my hair cut by a family member last week and it was great. No chit chat, comfortable environment,  limited touching. 

This is a great post. I have found a local hair stylist who is not a chatterbox, and who has a small salon where the noise level is a lot lower than most other salons. He's a really nice guy and a marvellous barber who sets the tone of the salon. Calm and concentrated. He's more interested in getting your hair right than in interrogating you about your private life; or gossiping about other customers. And any conversations that go on in the salon are in English, so there's no extra fatigue involved.