Adult haircutting experiences

JustMe said:

they always want to chat. "Have you booked your holidays?"

I think people need to look at it another way - these people are bored sh*tless - spending all day, every day in a 12' box, on their feet doing a job guaranteed to give them RSI.

An ASD person with a specialist subject knowledge is like a breath of fresh air - I've found many just need you to talk about anything to relieve their suicidal boredom - so something out of the ordinary repertoire of "weather's nice" input is usually welcomed - even if they are baffled by your knowledge about 1965 Citroen 2CV engine rebuilds. 

I haven't been to a hairdresser/barber for years, thankfully! My partner was a hairdresser, many years ago, so I get it cut for free and without the added stress. I've always hated the hairdressers, mainly because they always want to chat. "Have you booked your holidays?", "Going anywhere nice this year?". "Just shut up and cut my hair!". I never said that, but I wanted to! Lol! The last few times I went to a local barber. I have short hair in a basic style so being a woman wasn't an issue. Apart from being miles cheaper, £20+ at a hairdresser's to less than £10 at the barber for the same service, the guy didn't insist on small talk either! Win, win. I'm super glad I don't have to do that now, though!

Will you keep the beard?

expensive lol i get my hair cut once a year and so it grows shoulder length, barber still only charges basic rate of £10 and i get it cut short so its alot of hair on floor and lotta stuff to cut.

I'm fortunate that my hair is long. I used to get it cut at the hair dressers and it was always between £25 and £35 for a trim, I always put it off. During Covid, I found out I could just trim the ends myself. Because it's long, any mistakes aren't noticeable. Takes me five minutes, costs nothing. I prefer it tied back, so again, it's easy to manage if I do it myself and isn't worth the trouble or expense. 

Ethan said:

Since lockdown I just use the clippers every couple of months (went full Buddhist one month - which I quite liked).

I've done the opposite. Have not cut my hair at all since February 2020 and grown a beard so it's very long now! It's the first time in my life I've had long hair or a beard.

Really not looking forward to going to the hairdresser but I don't think I can go on looking like I've been stranded on a desert island for much longer.

This sounds blissful!

I love massages and touch, but not at the same time as sensory overload and has to be from someone I know I trust. I have lots of links with people taking advantage of me physically and me not realising (me not catching social cues, I think), so trust has to come first. My PTSD episodes were about when I was hit as a child as well :(

It sucks that a sensory experience that can give so much pleasure can be associated with trauma. Glad not to have lost the pleasurable side completely though.

I like hair cuts - my wife has a visiting hair dresser who cuts my hair too - she knows I'm aspie - but only from chatting about stuff - she has a young autistic nephew so I'm a source of real-world autistic data

I'm like a cat - I could sit all day having my hair combed, pulled, trimmed - I normally pull my own hair when I need to stim.

I hate shaving in every possible way.

I've not been to a hairdresser/barber for years, I use electric clippers now to do my own grade-3 all over.

However, back when I did go to get my hair cut by a professsional, I didn't so much mind having my hair cut, but there is always this inane chatter that they try and I'm just there thinking "I don't know you, why would I want to have a conversation about my life?" Also there was the issue where I never knew what to ask for - the only times I ever tried anythign different was when a friend came with me and gave suggestions, otherwise I'd just ask for it to be the same but shorter. 

I don't have any sensory issues so I can't relate to this. Also the barber I typically go to always has the radio or tv show playing, so the staff would rather focus on that in the background than to have small talk and casual low brow chat with their customers.

I'm hoping to go full Buddhist one day! I think I would be hooked! (Except for the cold!) But I think not yet. Maybe when my hair is much more grey and frazzled. Only a few days ago it was down to my tail bone... Any hair cut leaves me in shock, so I'm trying to be sensible here, too!

Would love to shave my head in solidarity with someone going through chemo and for charity... but am NOT hoping for that situation to arise... Glad it hasn't yet, i.e. noone close to me is getting chemo.

Same here! I also love the book thing - usually get handed gossip magazines that remind me of the worst of humanity!

I absolutely hate them - but then I have an aversion to persons standing close to me with sharp objects  and the social chit chat.

Since lockdown I just use the clippers every couple of months (went full Buddhist one month - which I quite liked).

I got a haircut and shave yesterday for a Tenner. That's for nothing. :)

I can handle chit chat okay, but despise queues. So this setup suits me better. 

I've always found other people washing my hair uncomfortable. It seems to pull and hurt. I thought that was normal. May be not.

Biggest irritant for me is the small talk. Hair dressers seem to have a pathological need to know whether you are going out tonight, whether you have a boyfriend and where you are going on holiday. Why? I take a book and ignore my surroundings.

You're very wise. People do tend to get very frustrated if you just ignore them. They probably don't really enjoy talking about mowing the lawn, or boring people's holidays lying on a beach in the sun with strangers either, and knowing they don't have to could be nice for them. Hairdressers can be autistic too, too.

I browse the interweb to find the haircut I want and show the hairdresser the photo.  If I like the resulting haircut - I take selfies to show them next time.

If someone is going to be up close and in my personal space, I'm much more relaxed if they appear female.

RE: Talkative hairdressers

After showing the photo and answering any questions about it, I tell them I'd rather relax than talk and close my eyes. I've never noticed any negative response to this.

I don't like going for a hair cut, mainly because I would have to phone or go and talk to a receptionist to get an appointment. And then I stress about communicating how I want it to look. They always try to put you at ease by making small talk, which I find difficult and embarrassing. Although I do really like the feeling of having my hair washed.

I cut my own hair a few weeks ago and it was easier than I expected so I will probably keep doing that from now on because it is cheaper and less stressful.

These are really great tips, thank you. I must admit I hadn't thought about planning out these details beforehand and making requests in advance.

Things that worked for me:

Finding a small quiet barber and going there at their least busy time (ie if it's packed just don't go in)

Always going to the same one - and they really don't mind if you ask to wait for the person you know.

Take a picture of what you want (maybe of yourself from when you liked your hair?!)

That's all out of the window now as I decided to grow my hair from crew-cut down to my shoulders and I haven't had it cut for 2.5 years (and have moved town). I am massively not looking forward to a totally new experience...