studying, changing special interests, fatigue, burn out, alexithymia

Hi Phoebe,
I understand perfectly your  difficulties. I have a long experience with studies. In fact, I never stop to study, but I spent more 13 years on the chairs of the universities.
The advices of @Mantra are good. An add, I do it that in my studies and my work, and at the moment I help two french students to manage this problem (one student is Asperger). It is the management of the breath (like cardiac coherence), of the body during the courses and after the course how to organise your homework and more.
Sorry for my English, my mother language is french. But your studies French. Certainly you speak and write better than me.

ah what great ideas! Thank you, I shall bear that in mind.

Yep! I did the teaching assistant thing too.  It's exhausting.  I have taught adults and enjoyed it - errrr kids! Lovely, but ... no thanks!  It's trying to keep up with their behaviour and back chat.  I don't have the thinking time for that AND a lesson plan and soooo boistrous.  No wonder you're burned out, bless you!

I had more of rest on a French beach in mind, possibly with some chilled out one on one English tuition if you need an income. Or, once upon a time, the typical student rest was grape picking in France...physical exercise and nothing to drain your mental energy.  If they are still letting UK students spend their summers like that post-Brexit.

Ah, interesting, me too, except I was obsessed at A-level.

As it turns out I'm on my year abroad this year, but came back to England a little early at the start of April after a 6 month teaching assistantship in France because I was finding the job so hard... that's when I noticed how difficult I was finding it to function in everday life and which eventually led me to my autism diagnosis :) 

I do think I might benefit from a break because a lot of my issues with work are self perpetuating - low energy and low mood so lack of motivation so lack of progress and so on. i also think these feelings are contributing to a feeling of resentment and irritibility which is making me even more critical and dismissive of books which take a lot of energy to read and which I can't relate to 

Ah, I did Modern Foreign Languages, funnily enough.  I was obsessed at O level but had a hard time keeping up with the exhaustion at university.

Mantra's advice below is stuff full of good ideas.  If you're hitting burn out, maybe you do need a break.  Just an idea but could you take one in France? Would that give you the rest and the renewed interest on your return? 

Thank you! This is really helpful. :) 

Hi Phoebe,

I could have written the title to your post, and I have experienced what you describe - on multiple different levels.

My first recommendation is to lean into whatever support is on offer via disability support at uni. Some forms it might take are - extra time in assessments, quiet rooms for exams, and support for applying for things like funding for additional tutoring in areas you feel you need most. Keep talking to them as they may be able to give advice specifically for you as an autistic student and in many other areas, too. Unis often have a welfare team in addition to this (or may be called by another, similar name) - they're another great place to reach out to, especially on a wellness level. All these people could be open just for a one-off chat, or could be able to offer more involved / longer term support, depending on what you want or need.

With burnout - it's great you've recognised this in the first place. It's important generally in life to take care of yourself and learn what helps you rest and recharge. I have had different levels of burnout and the worst was due to me ignoring the signs and spending no time learning how to support myself, let alone coming close to addressing my needs for basics like down time. I had no idea what burnout was back then and just kept going and going. I could have chosen to take a break and recharge, but instead the burnout created a life intervention that forced me to take a break and recharge. I can joke about this now that I was not a quick learner because there really were tonnes of warning signs that I saw but chose to ignore!!

Switching interests - I've felt this on some level in the past. I'm also concerned that I will feel it in what I'm doing now because it's a relatively new path. All I can share is that, so far, I've found ways to keep myself connected to my 'why' - the bigger picture behind what I'm doing, and ALSO the connection to each specific sub-topic I'm studying. I sometimes find that my sensory things and social issues can dampen my interests and I seek things that are away from that additional stress. So it can seem like I'm not interested in the original topics, but in actual fact, I realise I'm needing more quiet time to work and focus, plus more free time. I've also found myself not liking having to work at other people's speed, so I try to make sure I take mini breaks (anything from 10 mins to a day or two) to let myself explore other things, slow down, etc. This all depends on the work load of course, deadlines, etc. but 10 mins is almost always possible. It's a balance. The hardest part is letting myself be imperfect at some things while other areas get more attention.

Taking a year out from uni is another option - to do whatever you choose, but then return to your degree afterwards (or not, if you chose not to). Besides talking to uni's disability support and welfare teams (who will probably be better prepped for these convos) you can also explore all these things with your tutor or another staff member you feel comfortable with. They're all there to help. Some will be better at it than others, to be expected, but at least there are usually multiple options. A decision on an option like this one will take time to explore.

Keep believing in yourself - you've already come a long way. Regardless of what you choose to do next, you've come this far and that's amazing for anyone, autistic or not.

Hi, thank you for replying. I'm studying French, and my course is mainly made up of literature. There are a lot of topics i have to cover and also a lot of choice to focus my attention in a particular area within those topics. My problem is that I'm not interested in the main overarching themes so sometimes there isn't even anything in the list I can imagine myself doing or get into even if I try. I'm fairly burned out and exhausted so reading is hard for me. I suspect that the course never suited me in the first place, adn that I was only ever interested in a few tangential or surface level aspects of it.

I'm quite visual and creative so my interests usually centre around tv, film, music things like that. But I've been gradually going into shutdown as my burn out has progressed so I've even stopped engaging with some of the normal forms of entertainment that used to interest me. I'm sorry for the inconclusive reply, I'm trying to work things out but I feel at a bit of a loss to be honest...

A lot of it does. I certainly have to focus on the topic and ONLY the topic to excel and that happens when something has REALLY grabbed my interest.  Fortunately, for me, that generally sustains until I've got to the end of what I set out to achieve, the qualification, the perfect crochet sock, whatever... and only then can I put it down and loose myself in something else.

What are you studying? Are there ways to adapt the modules or individual assignments you are taking to align with whatever it is that's igniting your interests right now?