Published on 12, July, 2020
I don't know where else to turn.
Had a therapy appointment yesterday, GP appointment tomorrow. I'm really hurting, but I can't tell anyone. The "S" word has consequences. I just can't say it, I cant cope with what might happen I'f I do.
It's ok, I don't expect any replies, I'm not after attention. I just needed somewhere I could be honest with myself.
Sorry.
*Thank you so much everyone for your kindness, you are all truly amazing people.
Just had a therapy session and next week we are going to meditate over the phone together. And I have to accept all my negative thoughts and really listen to them.
u are now on the same path as me
Yes, Buddhist mindful meditation. We will start by looking at our hands.
Yeah - there's that whole metaphor about putting on your own oxygen mask first, before you try to help others.
He said he was also to blame. But words are just words when there's no action. Husband calls me the "lynchpin" but right now I need to take a step back from that role.
its not your day. its time for their dad to help u ( the stealing issue ). Has he been helping ?
I hope that dealing with them will be positive for you! X
Do you mean my art or myself? - or something else? With my art, I'm not doing a lot really. With myself, I'm dealing with some past mistakes - nothing huge - just things that don't fit with my values.
What are you working on at the moment?
I probably should go for an MOT x
I'll stop commenting for now as I bet you want a break from answering me.
Ok. I still think it's worth getting the full blood count done though x
I've recently put on weight as I started eating again
All you need is the full blood count one to start with - it tells them loads.
I reckon you should insist on blood tests - there could be a physical problem causing this - I don't buy into depression causing extreme exhaustion. Have you lost any weight or anything that might indicate a physical issue?
I am really genuinely pleased that you're feeling strong, and I truly hope you keep feeling stronger, you honestly deserve that! I really want to get better, I'm so lost right now. I think I really do need help, I want to have a fulfilling life. To no longer want to end it. I just don't know how. Sorry
I know I talk about my mental illness on here a fair bit - but I've been well for three years now and there's no way I'm trying to come off my meds again, so I shouldn't get ill again.
It's ok - I'm feeling quite strong lately and I want to see you get better.
I'm so messed up, so confused. Adele I'm sorry, I shouldn't put this on you, that's really not fair.
You're right Adele M, he's very intelligent and highly manipulative. I feeling so vulnerable I completely fell for it.