Suppressing self harm

Does anyone hit themselves or bite themselves when really distressed? I've suppressed this behaviour for a few years now but then I have recouring thoughts about doing it and I feel really overwhelmed. Anyone else do this? At the moment my mind loop is how the inlaws way over stepped boundaries which caused us catastrophic issues. I will never forgive what they have put us all through. My husband kept telling me I was wrong, I'd be confused and let them bsack in again. Its caused me so much issues I had 2 breakdowns. I no longer have contact with them, it was an ultimatum to my husband as I could take no more.

This was backed up professionally too, but the lasting damage is done. And every few months I have the battle in my head of what they done, why i didnt set firm boundaries. The mental abuse from them.

I've had counselling over the years. I'm just tired. My words are jumbled I cant say what I need to. Typing is a bit easier. My brains all mixed up because I'm suppressing hitting myself or hurting myself im sure it's making me more overwhelmed