Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi
This week I left what I believe to be a great company as I've worked for them for seventeen years full time and twenty-three years part-time. I left 'mutually' but have left good staff behind with an antagonist working amongst them and other issues which aren't the company but people related.
I'm having an extremely bad day emotionally and haven't left my duvet. Whilst looking at my four walls of my bedroom I'm thinking of those I have left behind but also what I can do to help others. My hands are tied due to me leaving 'mutually' but there must be loopholes so I can help mainly other people. I believe in helping others and have real difficulty in looking after myself and in a way helping others does help me if that makes sense.
Hi addlestones,
been thinking of you quite a few times over the last two weeks. Funny, isn't it, given that we never met. Was just wondering how you are doing? Not expecting that all is great, just hoping not.worse than last week. Hope digging out this thread isn't making you feel worse, it's certainly not my intention, there was just nothing more suitable to reply to.
Hope you manage to look after yourself, difficult as this may be.
Hi Oktanol
I'm really struggling and spending more and more time in bed and when I can sleep because I dream rather than living a nightmare. I've lost not only an amazing job and left a great company while the antagonist and bullies remain at work but I've lost my identity and all my confidence.
I'm sorry you feel so completely lost at the moment, maybe not really surprised though. Totally agree with Misfit, that's exactly what it is. All these great opportunities, well, even if they exist it's not possible to see them at the moment. It doesn't mean there aren't any, but how and when you are able to see them doesn't seem to be something anyone else can decide or change really. I got those sort of comments a lot, that I should put it all behind me, look forward, there are so many opportunities (like I could work in a bar - yeah, right), stop being so negative - that's the problem, being negative about everything (which wasn't true, I was very realistic about most things apart from job opportunities)... I know people mean well and want to cheer you up but it can quite easily make feel even more alone and misunderstood.
Have you got someone who can accept that and help you a bit to keep yourself going? It's not always the most obvious people who may do that. Simple stuff I mean, like going for a little walk, even if it's just up and down the road, or making some food and eat it with you or coming over for a tea and a chat about whatever you want to talk about, also if it isn't anything positive or accept if you don't want to talk, or burning the leaving card for you, in case you had the pleasure of getting one, or just giving you a hug - the sort of stuff that seems nice but not really crucial when we are alright, but makes a huge difference when we aren't. Really hope you have someone, it wouldn't be a good time for being all left alone.
Sending you a big hug, wished it could be a real one