Published on 12, July, 2020
My son is 16 next month and i am looking for tips/ advice to promote independence.
I get him to help around the house cook/ clean/ laundry and look after his own personal hygiene. But i think i am still telling him to do things and when to do them.
He has no friends and has always preferred to be on his own, i have tried various groups and am waiting for an assesment for a new one for him to attend.
His mother & i are divorced and i see him 6 nights out of 14 (with him staying over at mine), should i be looking to reduce that and letting him choose when he wants to see me so he's not being treated like a younger child?
Any thoughts please??
Hi TipsWanted,
Personally, you sound like you are doing fine with your son, however if you want to prompt him less verbally, you could try using a visual chore timetable, rather than prompt him verbally. With my own son, I have to prompt him to look at the table, but then he follows the tasks in the order written. You might give that a try.
If your son has few friends, I'm sure he values his time spent with you. My own son values time with adults way more than with his peers, however, it's helpful to have a mix. Sometimes time spent with peers in an area of 'his special interest' may help break that barrier of anxiety in associating with your peers.
I'm sure you also appreciate that stucture and routine is also very important to those on the spectrum. If you intend to alter that, then speak with him first or better still ask him what he would like.
Regards,
CoogyBear