Published on 12, July, 2020
My daughter has recently been diagnosed with ASD. I've noticed for some time that she will avoid eating when she is feeling anxious. Today was the first day back at school so she was very anxious and said she didn't want to eat the breakfast options I provided. She also rarely, if ever, eats at school. We've tried school dinners and packed lunches however mostly these go uneaten. I am very worried as today she refused breakfast - no matter what I offered and ultimately she could have had anything she wanted - and had to go into school on her first day back in a new year (year 1 of primary - new teacher, new classroom etc) on a completely empty stomach. My wife feels that we shouldn't add more pressure on her to eat before school and should allow her body autonomy (whatever that is?) but I know how not eating breakfast effects children's concentration and learning, their mood etc. I don't know what to do for the best. I feel like trying to explain in the nicest possible way that eating before school will make her feel better overall and help her enjoy her school day. But my wife feels differently and says she is displaying PDA symptoms and that we should approach it from that perspective. I would really appreciate some advice on this from anyone with experience. Basically, do we trade off sending her to school on an empty stomach so she doesn't feel pressured into eating, with starting her day off with a good breakfast that will help make her day more enjoyable. Or is there something in between? Than you. John
Hey I’m sorry to hear that my daughter is also 5 and won’t eat breakfast before school, can I ask how did she get diagnosed, I have had a terrible first year of school (reception) she has a few things I suspect she may have it but quite unsure, covers her ears, constantly clicking her fingers, prefers adults to children, bad anxiety that’s a small list but I could go on and on, I’ve spoken to the school they do not seem interested and dismiss, I’ve been to the doctors and they refer me back to the school so I’m stuck and I don’t want to be causing her harm putting her through it all and not knowing if she has this. I just don’t know what to do or who to talk to?
Autism can be understood like just a different type of being human, but one more connected to the Natural physical world at the expense of social programming. There are positives to both. Preferring the company of grounded adults or even younger children is often because we're out of sync with our own peer group due to the difference in how we use linguistics, which is the main difference with Autism - words as utility for communication rather than symbolic.
We don't desensitise like our peers, so we have the ability under the right conditions to really sharpen our ability to recognise physical sensations. But we also have to be careful these are not harmed but protected. Many of us now adults have tinnitus but still have keen hearing. This sensitivity is internal and external. Many of us have gut-health issues. Or, I've yet to meet an Autistic who doesn't have gut sensitivity.
I've found the banana to be a trustworthy breakfast. And if I'm due somewhere, I might not eat as my digestion and constitution are not reliable.