Published on 12, July, 2020
My Son who’s seven was due to have his first swimming lesson after school today. He’s had lessons before but always weekends. This is the first time he’s gone out after school, he rarely has before. Despite me preparing him that he was going swimming after school, he got anxious and refused to go. Should we have made him go or would it just create anxiety in the future?
Hi, My instinct would be to let it go and not force it. There could be many reasons why he didn't want to go but it's actually quite positive that he is able to say that it is too overwhelming and that he doesn't want to go. I think it is probably a good idea to honour that. It is really important to learn to listen to what you need and to your energy levels and ability to cope with change and stressful situations, of course we can't avoid everything but pushing yourself too much to fit in or please others is one factor that can in the long term lead to burnout and exhaustion. Another factor could be that the school day itself is very exhausting (it can be really overwhelming especially for autistic individuals). Does he still want to go on the weekend? Does he enjoy swimming? Do you want him to go swimming so that he knows how to swim and will be safer? I wouldn't force it but of course I don't know your son.
He loves swimming and is usually keen to go at. the weekend but has times where he doesn’t want to to go.