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BAd day at the homestead

Oatcakes
over 13 years ago

Thanks I found the posts really helpful to gain an insight into my DS behaviour today..I can see now that the 2 friends he invited over were way to noisy and excitable and he melted down..this continued on and off for the remainder of the day until I managed to get him calm at bedtime...even a laugh before sleep.

I had the foresight to bundle the friends out the door quick sticks despite one of them being judgemental about DS I handled that firmly 'I will deal with the situation you need to go now'..but I didn't handle my son as well as I would have liked and feel I was too rigid..I didn't feel good about this afterwards.

I feel like I made him push that anger down and inwards when by the sound of it he desperately needed to let rip in safety..what works for one son may not work for the other. 

I need to experiment with different tactics perhaps..will look more closely at that. I 'm very new to this so forgive any clumsiness on my part..it's hard knowing how to strike the right balance between establishing right and wrong and not crushing DS in the process.

Is it best to let him burn out his anger or do normal time out's help...?? Time out works eventually but he seems to forget we have been through it very quickly and I am wondering if it will properly sink in with him that this is whats required.It feels to me like we are covering the same ground relentlessly without him getting any insight into how the process is supposed to work. 

 

DS is 5 this month and we are awaiting assessment...my partner is also waiting assessment and I am trying to work out angles for him too.

Oh dear school tomorrow..my heart feels very leaden tonight..I am putting off bed for no particular reason other than I am the last one up and am not being talked at for the first time today. 

Better get up there I guess by the time I get the boys to school I will feel I have done a full day....

 

BTW is it typical for people with spectrum disorders to constantly question everything and ask questions constantly about everything..thank goodness for Paulo Nuttini's song 'Pencil full of lead'..puts DS instantly in a good mood.

WIsh me luck

x

 

Parents
  • over 13 years ago

    Morning oatcakes,i'm always the last to sleep in my house  your half way there already ,you seem to to be very intuned .My daughter was 8 when she was diagnosed with asd................. her play limit back then was an( hour )when a friend came over, any thing beyond that then she would have a meltdown....................we find if our daughter loses control and gets very cross we let her ride it out by being supportive and calm and taught her over the years to ....1..... count slowley to ....10........and remove herself from a situation for calm down time ....easy to say i know ,but with consistancy it will work ........when we go out together we tell our daughter the plan of the day so she still has some form of structure ..................this helps to some degree with her mood and anxiety .Hope this helps .................let them know you understand there mood (so not to crush them) takes time your just getting your heads around it .xx

     

Reply
  • over 13 years ago

    Morning oatcakes,i'm always the last to sleep in my house  your half way there already ,you seem to to be very intuned .My daughter was 8 when she was diagnosed with asd................. her play limit back then was an( hour )when a friend came over, any thing beyond that then she would have a meltdown....................we find if our daughter loses control and gets very cross we let her ride it out by being supportive and calm and taught her over the years to ....1..... count slowley to ....10........and remove herself from a situation for calm down time ....easy to say i know ,but with consistancy it will work ........when we go out together we tell our daughter the plan of the day so she still has some form of structure ..................this helps to some degree with her mood and anxiety .Hope this helps .................let them know you understand there mood (so not to crush them) takes time your just getting your heads around it .xx

     

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