Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello everyone!
My son is in year 5 now and we will have to apply for secondary school places this October. He has high functioning autism and is academically able. However, he has severe anxiety and maybe PDA (not diagnosed) and he finds the social interactions in school very stressful. He has various sensory issues and struggles with certain noises, odours and tastes. He masks well at school but comes home and behaves very badly; lashes out at us in anger, avoids self care and doesn't want to do homework. But he is very creative, humorous, a voracious reader and generally intelligent. He doesn't have an EHCP because the school feels he's very able, well behaved and there is no evidence of an issue.
My son's inability to cope in a social environment, makes him awkward and very prone to bullying. Also he finds it hard to deal with strict teachers and feels terribly anxious about being shouted at.
Given his ability, he needs to be in an academic environment is what I feel. He could well get into a grammar school, if he prepared well. He is a good learner and deserves to go to university.
Many friends have advised me that he needs to go to a private school with a small class size. Given his talent I don't want him to be deprived of a high quality education, but at the same time I want him to be in a school where they understand his condition and provide appropriate support. His current state school simply cannot understand his issues.
The NAS has listed a few schools with a specialist unit. If your child attends any of these schools especially Salesian in Chertsey, Surrey, please can you let me know your experience.
Also any advice on either private or state schools would be highly appreciated. I am ready to move if we find the right school. Right now based in greater london borough - east of london, but can move to surrey and nearby areas.
Thanks so much!
Hello!
I worked in SEND in secondary schools as a manager for ten years. To reiterate what has been said above, get the EHCP. Many of my students who struggled so much at secondary were very similar to your son - just about coping with primary but then spiralling very badly at secondary due to the increased sensory and social demands. Apply for the EHCP yourself but you must include as much detail as possible if the school is unsupportive - when you think you have enough evidence, double it. There is a significant risk that the LA will issue the EHCP and then try and strong arm you into a mainstream placement - do not accept this and threaten to take them to tribunal. You have the right to request a private placement if it is best suited to your son’s needs. 90% of the time the LA will concede and back down rather than go to tribunal. Ultimately, you should not be forced to pay to have your son’s needs met because his school can’t be bothered to support you in the EHCP process and the LA would rather not spend the money. I feel very strongly that parents with the capacity to force LAs to fulfil their statutory duty should do so - without these parents fighting the good fight, the system will never get better.
Thanks so much for this encouraging advice TBC! I feel much better to know what options are available.
Very grateful for your advice!
xx