17 year old daughter

Daughter 17, was diagnosed with autism in July this year, she had been masking. 

She has been struggling with making friends and has a lot of anxiety concerning this. 

Attending 6th form College has become too much for her due to the travel and loneliness, therefore now studying online. Of course this has resulted in her becoming more isolated which we tried to talk to her about before she made the change but she wouldn't listen. 

She hasn't done any studying for two weeks and has been spending a lot of time asleep. I understand that she might be tired if she has been coping with her day, but today for example she has not been out of the house and only just got out of bed (6pm). I've suggested that she might be depressed but she says no and won't let me make an appointment with the Dr's. Even if I did make one without her approval she would refuse to go. - she reckons that she will go to Uni next year and will make loads of friends and be away from her horrible parents... I've tried to suggest that she may not make friends for a variety of reasons but she won't listen and I'm being negative.. but as I've said she isn't doing any work... 

I've tried to suggest different social groups both for autistic people but she won't go

I don't know what to say or do.... help... 

Parents
  • Hi

    You can't force friendships - spending all their time in their rooms is very common.     The whole social anxiety and masking to hide from manipulators & bullies means that almost everyone will fail the "can I be bothered talking to you" test.

    The more you push, the more she will resist - she knows best - like every other teenager.  Smiley

    Anxiety over every little thing causes extreme fatigue so sleeping lots is common too.     Do you think she will pass this course with enough points to get to uni?   What's plan B if she doesn't get into uni?

Reply
  • Hi

    You can't force friendships - spending all their time in their rooms is very common.     The whole social anxiety and masking to hide from manipulators & bullies means that almost everyone will fail the "can I be bothered talking to you" test.

    The more you push, the more she will resist - she knows best - like every other teenager.  Smiley

    Anxiety over every little thing causes extreme fatigue so sleeping lots is common too.     Do you think she will pass this course with enough points to get to uni?   What's plan B if she doesn't get into uni?

Children
  • Thanks Plastic 

    I understood the extreme fatigue when DD was going to College, but when she isn't going out anywhere, I don't understand the cause of the fatigue?? How can I help, will it get any better as she gets older?

    No plan B "as she doesn't need one"....