Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi folks. I'm new here.
For a while now, I've been worried about my eleven year old. Here is some info:
Currently in year 6, none of his teachers have ever brought up any concerns and parents evenings always very positive.
I’ve made him an appointment at the doctors, initially for points 5 & 6 above, but only tonight my wife and I have read online that points 2, 3 & 4 may indicate autism. My mother had mentioned to me in the past that point 1 may be a sign, too, but I didn't pursue it.
I'd welcome any thoughts, please. Many thanks.
Hi... your son sounds very much like my son, who after 3 years has just been diagnosed with ASD. My son does give eye contact, but it is actually more of a 'staring right through you'. He is totally and utterly obsessed with his electronic devices. His life revolves around his Xbox and his Ipad and if we try and limit the amount of time he spends on them then we have issues - he's damaged furniture, thrown things at the walls etc. We had thought he was on the spectrum for a while when things were no longer 'age appropriate', but when he turned 11 things got progressively worse - meltdowns, anger issues (probably made worse due to puberty). He started saying he hated his life and wished he was dead etc. and it was at this low point we decided to go to the doctors. The first doctor 'fobbed' me off and I left it a year before going back to my doctor who referred us to CAMHS. At school he has never had any problems and they hadn't even noticed anything, but home was very much different. It's been a long hard journey to diagnosis and when things were rock bottom we had help from Family Support (through CAMHS). Without this I don't know where we'd be now or how we would have coped. The diagnosis for us has been important for us to ensure he gets the necessary support when needed, especially with GCSE's next year and needing to make a choice about the college he wants to go to. We're currently struggling with getting him to do any school work at home, or revision !! To get him to do an hour's study when he is on his Xbox for anything up to 10 hours at weekends is near impossible.
I think you are right to go to the doctors... when I was made to feel it was all 'in my head' the first time I contacted YoungMinds before going back to the doctors and they got a professional to call me back https://youngminds.org.uk/
I'm glad we went and got the referral when we did as it can be a long process, so don't delay. The important thing is getting the right help when you may need it...
Thank you, both, for your helpful replies. My goal is to understand my son, his needs and how I can help him. I will continue to read more. Thanks again.
Hi, your son very well can have autism. Points 1-8 speak to that and none of the points 10-12 are evidence to the contrary. Perhaps you might expand with specific examples, so we could elaborate, but indeed it all looks familiar
You might try to read on the NAS website and in here to see what other behaviours of your son could be evidence of autism. It is not unusual for bright high functioning children to not be picked up until secondary school. Some autistic people go through education and life without diagnosis until quite late, I heard one woman as diagnosed at 83. But many children really start to struggle in mainstream secondary and absence of proper support could rapidly deteriorate into anxiety, school refusal and mental health crisis. So it makes sense to pursue the diagnosis as it is a very long and slow process.
I have asperger's myself. Wondering if I can help you at all.I understand you're concerned-- but I wonder what is your goal or what you are looking to do?In my opinion, he most definitely is on the spectrum.