Need your advice for Female Asperger's Syndrome

Hello everyone,

I am a 24-year-old female suffering from what seems to be a life-long state of depression. This depression has been with me for as long as I can remember and basically stems from some kind of deep chronic loneliness I can't understand. In trying to understand this loneliness, I have always had questions about who I am and why I am so different. I have considered bipolar disorder and ADHD. But in my search for answers, I came across the help4aspergers website that listed characteristics specific to women with aspergers, which has been making me think. 

Before I decide to seek professional help, my question is, can someone out there please give me their own opinion as to whether or not they think I could have Asperger's Syndrome?

The challenge is that I do not seem to experience the 3 main social/communication aspects of the disorder strongly, although I can say that there are times when I do.

Here is a run-down of the my basic eccentricities/habits:

1.) I am a loner and introverted. Although the irony is that I have a very sunny and outward personality (people say that I am quite hyper and high energy), I find it difficult to sustain real friendships with people. After being introduced to people and getting along perfectly well, I disappear.. I don't know why I do this.. But it's as if I get panic attacks imagining what I would do or say if I had to hang out with them..

2.) In school, I had only one or two close friends. I was definitely an outsider and couldnt mingle the same way that the oher children did. I had a tendency to daydream quite a lot.Teachers said I was "physically present but mentally absent."

3.) I read the same books over and over. My main interests are fantasy/science fiction, children's books, and memoirs.

4.) I had one obsession in high school, which was music. All my awards were music related. In fact, this was the only area of interest I had and bothered pursuing.

5.) When I was younger, I hated being touched and felt very awkward when people would show physical displays of affection towards me. However, after my last relationship, I like hugging people now (people I am close to).

6.) As a teenager, I wore the same 3 shirts and 2 pairs of jeans my entire life and never bothered about fashion.

7.) I had very poor personal hygiene when I was younger. It was as if other girls my age knew instinctively to be squeaky clean and pretty, brushing their hair and all that. I was known for my messy hair and unkempt uniform and sometimes  did not take a bath.

8.) I can be incredibly emotionally immature and moody for the shallowest reasons. Ex. not eating my favorite food for the day. Not having my usual time to daydream.

After many years of knowing myself for having the above eccentricities while I was growing up, I thought I had just matured and was over all these.

But my recent corporate experience has left me severely depressed and in a state of trauma. I felt like an outsider, a child once again.

Someone help me, please. Would appreciate your feedback.. Thank you very much.

Parents
  • Hi everyone, 

    It's my first time on one of these forums so I'm a little nervous. I'm a 29 year old female with a 10 year old autistic son. Most recently looking at my son I've realised that I'm just like him and believe I have aspergers. I too went on the help4aspergers website, brought the book and its been like looking at myself in a mirror. 

    I am extremely isolated and have very few people around me. My kids are all I really have. Social situations are awful I'm always standing around in a corner by myself hoping someone will approach me. I say what's on my mind without thinking how someone else will be affected. No matter what I say people are always offended. I burn bridges without any explanation.

    I don't like being touched, unless I'm the one doing it. I have to cut labels out of my clothing.

    I do things exactly the same way. Even when driving I tend to take the same routes. If someone messes up my routine I find this really difficult. 

    I know how to make eye contact but find it extremely painful. It feels like laser beams piercing through me.

    Sorry to go on and on, the list for me is endless. I'm currently seeing a therapist who specialises in ASD and AS in adults and I'm thinking about going through the diagnosis process. I have great anxiety about this and am worried that they'll say it's something else or nothing at all.

    My therapist has said she'll support me when going to the GP, but I really don't know what to do.

    Has anyone got any advise?

Reply
  • Hi everyone, 

    It's my first time on one of these forums so I'm a little nervous. I'm a 29 year old female with a 10 year old autistic son. Most recently looking at my son I've realised that I'm just like him and believe I have aspergers. I too went on the help4aspergers website, brought the book and its been like looking at myself in a mirror. 

    I am extremely isolated and have very few people around me. My kids are all I really have. Social situations are awful I'm always standing around in a corner by myself hoping someone will approach me. I say what's on my mind without thinking how someone else will be affected. No matter what I say people are always offended. I burn bridges without any explanation.

    I don't like being touched, unless I'm the one doing it. I have to cut labels out of my clothing.

    I do things exactly the same way. Even when driving I tend to take the same routes. If someone messes up my routine I find this really difficult. 

    I know how to make eye contact but find it extremely painful. It feels like laser beams piercing through me.

    Sorry to go on and on, the list for me is endless. I'm currently seeing a therapist who specialises in ASD and AS in adults and I'm thinking about going through the diagnosis process. I have great anxiety about this and am worried that they'll say it's something else or nothing at all.

    My therapist has said she'll support me when going to the GP, but I really don't know what to do.

    Has anyone got any advise?

Children
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