Published on 12, July, 2020
I speak a lot to people online (I'm much more comfortable with this than in person) but sometimes on random days i will just get so internally angry while they are speaking, usually it's while I'm doing something like just recently playing a game while chatting with a friend. I was fine while we were playing together but when we started playing separate games and he kept talking I just wanted to tell him to be quiet and in the back of my head I feel bad because I care about our conversations but sometimes I just need silence. I feel like i get annoyed too easily but this has happened with two of my friends now and I dont know if it's just me, if I'm just a bad person.
Recently I've also been on some new medication and one of its side effects is that it makes me super tired, I dont know if that contributes to it any but it has been worse since I've been on this medication. I just dont want to change how I've been doing stuff because I've been so tired, I literally slept the whole of yesterday away because of it and I hate it.
I think it’s normal. It’s nothing bad to not want to speak at the moment. I don’t know how you tell that to other people, but maybe instead of saying something like “stop talking” or worse “shut up” (if this is the case) you can just say that you are not in a mood to talk and let’s talk some other time. Clear communication is important and I find it normal even for NTs to not want to talk at the moment.
I get that, just wondering if its normal to feel so angry about it in the moment I suppose. I never usually say anything I just ignore it and keep talking, it just still makes me feel guilty.