Autism & Alcohol

I’m 56 and my love affair with alcohol started when I was still at school. I found it a great enabler and made me seem more ‘normal’ if that’s the right word. I’m one of those who can’t have one drink, if I’m not drinking then I don’t feel the need, once I’ve had a drink then I can’t stop.

I can’t remember the amount of social occasions that I have drank to a massive excess just to get through it. I’ve often hated myself for not being able to stop. I eventually cut down to just drinking at weekends, to be honest I was still binge drinking.  I’ve had a few trips to the GP in the last couple of months for joint pain, as a result I have been taking antibiotics, anti-inflammatory / pain killer and another pill to stop my stomach from bleeding from the other pills. 
The only good thing is that I can’t drink alcohol with them, I haven’t touched a drop in 8 weeks, it’s not been easy but I do feel much better, anxiety has gone down massively, sleep has been greatly improved and it’s nice waking up in the mornings with a clear head.

I have just started another month of medication so still staying away from alcohol. What I have found is that time spent on my special interest has gone ballistic, I seem to spend hours every day researching some part of it. 

Now alcohol is out of my system and blood tests show I have normal liver and kidney function, I think I’m going to plod on as I am. The more I know and understand about my self and how autism affects me, the less I want to punish myself anymore. I needed that gap from using alcohol as my system has never been clear of it, I hope I have the strength to carry on.

Has anyone else struggled with using alcohol to control one’s self and navigate life?