RSD




Some bits fit = often feel rejected,low self esteem, feeling left out,feel I'm not good enough,feel uncomfortable when praised,don't like taking risks, people pleaser,difficult starting things  when I might fail-avoidant re further education(fear of failure due to executive functioning  difficulties),

  • Dear  , I am sorry you are going through such a tough time. It’s good that you’ve let us know what’s happening and how you’re feeling. Many people have similar thoughts when coping with so much and we hope you’re okay.  

    If you are unable to cope with the distress or despair, it’s very important to tell someone about your feelings or thoughts of suicide. Call your GP and make an urgent appointment. Your GP can make sure you get appropriate help and support. 

    If it’s outside your GP hours call 111 to reach the NHS 111 service: 

    https://www.nhs.uk/nhs-services/urgent-and-emergency-care-services/when-to-use-111/ 

    The Samaritans also provide confidential non-judgemental emotional support, 24 hours a day on 116 123, or by email on jo@samaritans.org. 

    MIND have information pages on coping with self harm orsuicidal feelings based on the experiences of people who’ve been through it that you may find helpful.  

    If you are very close to doing something to hurt yourself - call 999 now or go to your nearest A&E department. There should be someone there to support you and make sure you get ongoing support.   

    You can find more information here: 

    https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/mental-health/suicide 

    Best wishes,

    Anna Mod

  • I used to be fascinated by infographics like these as a child. Nowadays they seen so inexplicably unappealing to me.

    Seeing this and, subsequently, being caused to judge that all of those descriptive propositions are accurate to my experience makes no practical difference to my experience. I still have no control in my life and hate nearly everything I can think of and will probably be like this until the day I die, no matter how many infographics I see.

  • Oh wow, a lot of these points describe me, I never knew it was described like this. The people-pleaser one in particular. I once had a therapist suggest I do a personality assessment to help them get a rounded picture of the type of person I am (can't remember what the test was called). For "conscientiousness" I think I scored something like 94% - meaning I'm extremely dependable, absolutely hate being even a second late or breaking a promise. But it also means I'll put myself through hell and suffer rather than let someone down even slightly.

  • I think a lot of the time I expect to fail, or at least not do very well and when I do, do well I feel like I've got away with it. I'm not good with compliments and praise either, my first thought, is 'what are you after?' I got a lot more confident about recieving criticism at uni, but that was because it was always positive and telling me how I could better present myself in essays rather than telling me how awful I was. I gave me the confidence to challenge a lecturer who undermarked me and I got an upwardly revised mark.

    I'm not a physical risk taker and I'm definately not an adreniline junkie, why would I want to jump out of a plane, abseil or bungee jump, do whitewater rafting or whatever just to know I'm alive! I've been in enough real life danger, enough times to be glad that I'm alive and I don't want any more almost died experiences thankyou very much.

    I'm not in a rut, I'm happily ploughing my own furrow, by myself, without interferance and if I want help I'll ask for it. I think there's to much emphasis on challenging oneself and "doing things!" seemingly for the sake of being able to say you've done so and get some sort of brownie points from people who's opinions don't really matter. 

    That being said there are some very real problems caused by lack of confidence and low self esteem as I know all to well.

  • Few months since this chat and I've just ended up looking at RSD more again.

    Recent life events have been tough and I've noticed more and more how RSD plays into issues that blow up at stressful times and make them harder.

    I can now make a connection between RSD and many things, feeling like people are being overly critical because they don't like me or think I'm stupid. Taking things so personally that I am enraged by them,  the list goes on.

    Has anyone found any coping mechanisms for RSD?

  • I feel this so strongly. Often feel rejected (although I definitely think a lot of that is real) and I feel it so strongly. I'm not good with criticism at all and have a massive fear of failure. Struggle to deal with making mistakes. I really beat myself up and it feels like the end of the world. Definitely think it's something that has got worse over the years. I genuinely think it's one of the aspects of being AuDHD that has some of the biggest impact on my life.

  • I have to say it ticks boxes for me. Conflict avoidance is a big one for me

  • Thinking about it ,also 'replays upsetting times and events,'.  As for good things- A  great non blood related family that are as special as special can be,small but good flat,4 figure savings, mind still reasonably sharp,

  • Absolutely all of that fits for me.

    I hadn't heard about it till it was mentioned post diagnosis, then it all started to make sense, it's driven everything for me and still does.

    Summed up I think it's behind every fear of looking bad/wrong and that could result in someone rejecting, disliking me or thinking I'm stupid etc., which is underlying in every decision I make.

  • This ticks so many boxes for me.

    Looking back at how these impacted my life I wonder how I made it this far (late 50s).

    Personally I try to find the good in life to help counterbalance this "bad" stuff - it gets terribly depressing if you only look at the dark side.

  • All of them for me