Published on 12, July, 2020
Substandard educational qualifications (partly to blame = not getting over the bullying related trauma)
Never had a paid job.
No friends IRL
Manage badly without support
How about this:
I'm having one of those 'I don't feel right, but I don't know why' days.
Me too firemonkey, it's heart wrenching when dealing with self hate thoughts. I just spoke and cried with my Mum which helped. Is there someone you can talk with on the phone or is typing easier for you?
In my case I have one because it's very hit and miss re getting the swiping right with a smartphone. My daughter thinks it's because I'm too heavy handed(dyspraxia?!!).
Senior phones are great! The buttons are big enough, tehandsfree works, and the good ones simply don't run "Apps" !
The phone actually works FOR you rather than dominating you with crapola.
I don't know whether this is a psychological effect of bullying related trauma or not. I can go from feeling I'm useless and worthless to 'back against the wall' false bravado/ bragging.
Perhaps sharing here (if you feel comfortable) or with one of your family could help make things clearer and less painful in your mind? It's awful I know but a member here just wrote the most beautiful post to me which helped immeasurably.
I hardly use my landline ,or the senior phone I have. Mostly I interact with my chosen family F2F or via FB private messaging. The only person I regularly email is my younger brother. Typing is easier, even though my typing speed is about 16 wpm. There are a couple of things, one understandable the other trivial, that are pushing hard on my ' I don't like uncertainty' button.