Autistic Burnout

Welcome Bubby

I'm always a little cautious to advise people in very certain tones that THIS IS HOW IT IS, because I know, no matter how sure I am myself, someone else's experiences of life may be rather different.  But from what I've experienced, this feeling of burnout is a result of trying to be Neurotypical when you aren't.

Burnout - is a term which I take to be, you are exhausted, you are tired, you are using up large amounts of energy thinking, processing, acting. The reason you're doing so much is because you're struggling to fit the neurotypical bench-mark of how people act. You are pretending.

Or to be more accurate in my case - TRYING to act, but as I don't really know how to act, I was only guessing and probably doing a pretty bad job.

I'm 46, I had my diagnosis about 4 months ago now.  In that time I've left my old job (nothing to do with the Autism, it was just time) and started a new role.  After 25 years of working, this is my first job I'm officially OUT as a man with autism.

What this means in real terms.

- I don't feel nervous about talking to new people anymore, I launch in with a big HELLO, and probably within the first 2 minutes explain I'm autistic.

- there's then a few minutes where I explain this is new to me, so I'm learning how to talk to people because I don't normally do it and I'm sorry if my speech patterns, energy or topics of conversation seem strange.

- then launch into any conversation I like...

- I comfortably stim* in work without shame if it feels right

- I leave rooms or meetings if for whatever reason I'm feeling uncomfortable and it gets too much.

Basically I've turned into an Autistic freedom fighter, shameless, proud and for once in my life - comfortable.  I'm still tired (it's 18:18 on Saturday, I can feel my eye lids getting heavy).  But life doesn't feel as so much hard work as it did.

I think the more you learn about Autism (read, read, read some more, watch a video, read some more) the more you'll understand how the aspects effect you as a person, perhaps you'll be able to apply them to your daily life, learn and have confidence in what is "normal" for you, and you'll end up working less hard then you have done.

* Stimming if you've not come across it yet in your research, is the sort of repetitive actions a lot of us do instinctively to help soothe, hand flapping or rocking etc. Although most of us learn not to do it in public because at school you get picked on, and in the street you get stared at.  For me, my stimming tends to look like scrunching my hands under my chin and squeezing, it's a bit like a self hug.

Welcome Bubby

I'm always a little cautious to advise people in very certain tones that THIS IS HOW IT IS, because I know, no matter how sure I am myself, someone else's experiences of life may be rather different.  But from what I've experienced, this feeling of burnout is a result of trying to be Neurotypical when you aren't.

Burnout - is a term which I take to be, you are exhausted, you are tired, you are using up large amounts of energy thinking, processing, acting. The reason you're doing so much is because you're struggling to fit the neurotypical bench-mark of how people act. You are pretending.

Or to be more accurate in my case - TRYING to act, but as I don't really know how to act, I was only guessing and probably doing a pretty bad job.

I'm 46, I had my diagnosis about 4 months ago now.  In that time I've left my old job (nothing to do with the Autism, it was just time) and started a new role.  After 25 years of working, this is my first job I'm officially OUT as a man with autism.

What this means in real terms.

- I don't feel nervous about talking to new people anymore, I launch in with a big HELLO, and probably within the first 2 minutes explain I'm autistic.

- there's then a few minutes where I explain this is new to me, so I'm learning how to talk to people because I don't normally do it and I'm sorry if my speech patterns, energy or topics of conversation seem strange.

- then launch into any conversation I like...

- I comfortably stim* in work without shame if it feels right

- I leave rooms or meetings if for whatever reason I'm feeling uncomfortable and it gets too much.

Basically I've turned into an Autistic freedom fighter, shameless, proud and for once in my life - comfortable.  I'm still tired (it's 18:18 on Saturday, I can feel my eye lids getting heavy).  But life doesn't feel as so much hard work as it did.

I think the more you learn about Autism (read, read, read some more, watch a video, read some more) the more you'll understand how the aspects effect you as a person, perhaps you'll be able to apply them to your daily life, learn and have confidence in what is "normal" for you, and you'll end up working less hard then you have done.

* Stimming if you've not come across it yet in your research, is the sort of repetitive actions a lot of us do instinctively to help soothe, hand flapping or rocking etc. Although most of us learn not to do it in public because at school you get picked on, and in the street you get stared at.  For me, my stimming tends to look like scrunching my hands under my chin and squeezing, it's a bit like a self hug.