Published on 12, July, 2020
Hey everyone
Sorry to toss this out there but wondering if the following constitutes as a meltdown? I was with friends for dinner on Sunday and felt like I had to endure into the evening (probably 12pm)
I felt ok Monday and Tuesday but I feel dreadful now. We were invited to their 40th birthday this coming November while we were at dinner and I can’t stop going over this even though it’s months away. Obviously this is a big thing for me and my brain is trying to pre think scenarios and generally how I’m going to get through it. The whole evening was exhausting and I was very quiet, I just wanted to go home. I put myself through this for my family tbh as I don’t want them to miss out.
I really feel quite low today and the slightest thing makes me panic.
Would be very grateful if anyone has any thoughts please?
I used to go to gatherings when invited because I thought it was rude not to.
One day I just didn't go. It was a family members big birthday. And then I realised it really didn't matter that I wasn't there, and actually, the obvious distress these events always caused me was a strain on everyone else as well as myself. I haven't put myself through it since.
I'm not sure this is the answer in your situation, perhaps simply giving yourself the option. To say...it is ok if, at the time, i do not feel able to make this event. Or, if I go for a short period of time. I may not even take my coat off! Sometimes we can fare better than we think, other times worse, I have found. Not having any pressure leading up to it, being ok with whatever you decide to do...be kind to yourself.
Otherwise you will get stressed, raise your cortisol levels, increase inflammation, get ill....how does that benefit your family?
There was one time that I had not had any caffeine for a couple of months, and then went to an event and drank full fat coca cola. It was brilliant! So, maybe that could be an option?
Go easy on yourself, don't spend months stressing. x
Hi
Thank you for your story. I might just try that with the Coca Cola. I’m sure one day my partner will accept that sometimes I just can’t manage it. We were supposed to go ta NYE party and my wife ended up with a cough and cold, I was so relieved it felt like I had won the lottery tbh.
Thank you for your suggestions
Take care