Published on 12, July, 2020
I can only enjoy good things if I 'deserve' them, and that means I must either work hard before the good thing or be sad or tired before the good thing.
It doesn't make sense because people's worth is not in their productivity but my brain is still being difficult.
It makes it hard for me to take long breaks, more than one day of taking a break gets me all depressed and guilty.
And I always have a general sense of guilt for everything; examples:
I don't know how to change this. Is it my own ableism (like feeling bad for not having a driving license even though I know driving was overwhelming and stressful for me), is it something my parents taught me, or something else?
Any thoughts are appreciated. Thank you!
Read "The Secret". You are over thinking it.
Oh, I've heard very bad things about that book from a reliable source if it's the same The Secret. I've heard it's complete pseudoscience...It's alright if you wanna believe in things like that, none of my business, but if it's the The Secret I think it is...man, no, won't be helpful for me definitely.
But I'm definitely not overthinking it, this has been a struggle for years.
Thanks for your reply anyway though.