Published on 12, July, 2020
What is your understanding of Alexithymia?
I know it's probably difficult for people with Alexithymia to explain and know things like this.
I've suspected I might have it. I've always had 'mild' emotions, I'm not sure if I like something at times, I'm not sure if I'm sensitive to sounds, textures, etc. and I don't know how being sensitive actually feels; Is it what I'm experiencing or is it something else?
And most of the times, I only understand my thoughts and feelings after journaling or showering, I always thought I was great with my emotions but recently realized it's just cause I practice it a lot and know a lot of helpful tools, but in actuality I need so much time and effort to understand thoughts and they rarely come instantaneously.
I don't know, even now I'm questioning if what I've written are my true thoughts and feelings or I just think they are.
I too always thought I was very self aware and knew my own mind but in reality I just over think everything and I'm probably "numb" to a lot of things.
Like Amerantin I only really feel anger, sadness or anxiety (but very intensely). I don't get excited - only anxious.
A sad tale - years ago my long term partner asked me if I loved them and I could only, honestly, answer her..."I don't know".
I had a similar experience when my former therapist asked me what it was like when I fell in love with my girlfriend at the time. My answer was that on the one hand it was nice but at the same time very tiring. That completely upset her and she said it was very simple and then she described to me how one must feel in such a situation. In general I only recognize very extreme feelings. I also have problems recognizing some body signals such as hunger.