Published on 12, July, 2020
I've been struggling lately. Maybe it's because it's cold and dark most days, will I brighten up when the weather does? I've had depression and anxiety for ages. Both cause difficulties in my every day life, nothing serious but a big hassle I could do without.
I've grown increasingly concerned about my mum who is mid fifties and growing increasingly forgetful, forgetting shopping, names and repeating stuff to me she told me earlier on. Bit of a worry. Her mum had Alzheimer's and I'm worried she's going the same way. I'm no longer involved in with the mental health team but I'm increasingly tempted to get in touch so I can get help with the increasing pressure. I'm ok, I'm keeping busy, but it feels like I'm starting to crash and burn and I can't get the worry off my mind. I'm up all night, can't sleep, and my pain from fibromyalgia has increased likely from the anxiety. So I need to see the GP about that, need my medicine altered. I could mention my other worries to her but GP visits aren't my fave place so I try and get in and out within twenty mins.
I'm sorry depression and life are dragging you down. Winter definitely doesn't help, the constant crap weather and dark make you feel worse but I guarantee as it warms up and starts to get brighter you'll feel heaps better.
I can understand you worrying about your mum. Parents are a big cause for concern. Have you tried talking to her about your worries? She might be able to put your mind at ease, it could just be general forgetfulness or maybe she's stressed about something and it's playing on her mind. Talking could get it off your mind and give you room to relax a little.
I've struggled with depression since 2016, it has its ups and downs. I enjoy the best days and forget the ones. Don't let things get to you or they'll drag you too rock bottom.
If things are getting too much and you need a chat, give Samaritans a call:
116 123
I hope you're okay. Keep smiling x