Going to University as an autistic person

Hi, I am autistic and whilst there were challenges I can confidently say that going to university was the best thing that happened to me!! I was so alone at school- a real alien and I just couldn't connect to anyone. At university I made a few very close friends- We just connected and making friends happened almost effortlessly at university- which is crazy considering I had none at school. I finally met likeminded people at university. I'm so happy that I went. 

Also I have to admit that I never went out clubbing and drinking and still don't: There was one disastrous exception of me entering a club but not drinking... and one disastrous pub crawl. After a LOT of convincing I once entered a club, lasted for less than 30 minutes (i cannot tolerate the crowds and noise) and I didn't drink. I also went on a pub crawl once in Fresher's week...  though again I did not drink and I swore that that was the first and last time. I thought I had to try and be "social" in Fresher's week but that didn't really get me anywhere and for me the best strategy was to try and be myself :). I didn't have a single drink while at university and it wasn't a problem- most of my friends don't drink either. So I think if clubbing and drinking is not your thing, I wouldn't worry about that at all! I met most of my friends through shared interests (scientific talks) or through my course (including through always being late... haha, one of my friends and I always seemed to turn up to lectures at the same time... 5-10 minutes after the start so we got to know each other- I'm not suggesting you should be late for lectures ;) though I do always say the first 5 minutes are overrated but I have no evidence to support this claim as I was never there...). 

For me it was so much easier to connect to people at university than at school and it made me realise that I just hadn't met anyone I could connect to before. It's so much more likely that you will meet people that you have shared interests with at university than at school so I think your chances of making friends at uni are so so much higher than ever before :). Also there will be plenty of extracurricular activities and clubs to join (for anything you can imagine ...) if that is your thing- I know that at my university people would even start a new society if there wasn't one yet for the thing they were interested in. I personally didn't really join that many extracurriculars (I probably wish I had taken advantage a bit more of the opportunities and maybe withdrawn less)- but things still worked out ok for me and I met some friends :) I feel very lucky that I got to go to university. 

I wish you a good time at uni!! Out of curiosity, where are you going to uni and what subject will you be studying? 

My eldest had a similar experience Ann. He also didn’t drink alcohol (and still doesn’t - neither of my children have ever wanted to drink alcohol). My son didn’t go clubbing or anything like that. At Oxford they had Balls (very weird in many ways and completely alien to my working class autistic son) and he didn’t go to those either. It worried me initially as pretty much everyone went to them and I worried about him feeling ‘left out’ - but I soon realised that he had to be himself and if he forced himself to do social stuff he hated it would only make him stressed and unhappy so it would be pointless and unpleasant for him. He needed quiet down time after all the other things that were being demanded of him by the move to Uni. 
Finding like minded people with similar interests is definitely a bit easier at Uni. My eldest did have some difficult times I won’t lie - but I think that’s not uncommon for everyone at Uni - not just autistic people. Working through those difficulties is an important part of building independence though - if you don’t go through that you don’t learn your strengths and coping skills. If you don’t try these things you won’t learn what you can cope with, and what is probably not for you.
If you find yourself really struggling you can always access support and reasonable adjustments from the college, or get support form your family or friends. I remember going home occasionally for a few days to ‘escape’ college and have a rest from it all. So there’s always that if things get too much. 

My eldest had a similar experience Ann. He also didn’t drink alcohol (and still doesn’t - neither of my children have ever wanted to drink alcohol). My son didn’t go clubbing or anything like that. At Oxford they had Balls (very weird in many ways and completely alien to my working class autistic son) and he didn’t go to those either. It worried me initially as pretty much everyone went to them and I worried about him feeling ‘left out’ - but I soon realised that he had to be himself and if he forced himself to do social stuff he hated it would only make him stressed and unhappy so it would be pointless and unpleasant for him. He needed quiet down time after all the other things that were being demanded of him by the move to Uni. 
Finding like minded people with similar interests is definitely a bit easier at Uni. My eldest did have some difficult times I won’t lie - but I think that’s not uncommon for everyone at Uni - not just autistic people. Working through those difficulties is an important part of building independence though - if you don’t go through that you don’t learn your strengths and coping skills. If you don’t try these things you won’t learn what you can cope with, and what is probably not for you.
If you find yourself really struggling you can always access support and reasonable adjustments from the college, or get support form your family or friends. I remember going home occasionally for a few days to ‘escape’ college and have a rest from it all. So there’s always that if things get too much.