Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi there, I'm new to this forum and my counsellor advised me about this webpage. I'm a single mother to two children, my son Luke is 9 and undergoing diagnosis of ASD following 8 school exclusions and is now regularly seeing specialist for his pending diagnosis. I have known since he was a baby that he was different however it has taken this long for professionals to listen, I work full time as a health visitor however I am currently on the sick whilst assessments are ongoing as I could not do my job. I am hoping for some support from other parents as I have become very depressed and anxious about this situation and am trying to reach out to others that feel the same. I am currently on medication and started counselling which is going well but I want to cry all of the time and have minimal energy when it comes to the kids and day to day things. Has anyone else felt this way and is there an end to feeling this way, I know it's impacting on my kids but don't know how to feel better. Please help, any advice is welcomed xx
Hi Donna.
I've got a fair idea about how you feel. I've suffered with depression and anxiety for years and my son got his diagnosis this morning. It sounds to me like you're pretty much at rock bottom but things will get better, I promise. The hardest part is asking for help and you've already done that . Medication and counselling will work given time.
Do you get any help with your children from family/friends. As much as we love them we all need a break and time for ourselves . You must be under an awful lot of stress. What are you anxious about, the assessment process? My son was nervous about it at first but enjoyed it and looked forward to his appointments. It was a big relief for him when somebody understood how he was feeling and finally took him seriously. He has been much calmer and easier to live with since the process started. How does your son feel about being assessed?
Hi Julie
Thanks for replying, I have my Mam and friends for support however this is minimal due to life-work commitments and my Mam lives in another town. I haven't explained any assessments to my son yet as I have anxiety about him not getting a diagnosis which I'm told by professionals is unlikely but I'm still cautious. I am relieved he is being assessed for this as I've known there was something since he was very young so that part of it is a positive. I think the depression stems from 2 plus years of tough times coming to a head and lack of control over the situation so will just have to ride it out using counselling, antidepressants and CBT when it starts. I am just waiting until October for his diagnosis and then maybe I can get him settled into a School and my life back on track.
Thanks for your support. It is hugely appreciated.
Hi Donna, I can understand about your anxiety, I was the same with Matthew. It's taken me 3 years to get his diagnosis. Getting past the GP was the hardest part, one even dismissed the possibility completely and spoke to me like I was stupid because "autism isn't diagnosed at this age. (12 at the time). He would have been diagnosed in primary school if he had it". Utter rubbish! We were both gutted when the doctor said that. Matthew had asked me to take him because he was having trouble controlling himself and he even said that he thought he was autistic. He was eventually referred to children's mental health about his anxiety and within 5 minutes his specialist was talking about autism. She has been fantastic this year and has helped him a lot. These people really know their stuff so try not to worry about not getting the diagnosis. October will soon come round and like you said you can start to get back on track properly then. Good to hear you sounding more positive and I'm glad the counselling is helping.