diagnosed today

Yes, it's early days as you say, and like anything else it takes time to get used to. I was stunned when I got the diagnosis - no idea what it meant, no idea what to do next, and no-one available to help me understand it. Making the diagnosis was the end of the assessor's involvement, and he finished by recommending a few books and websites (this was one of them) and wishing me 'luck'. I wondered for ages what that meant.

Let me put a number to the people I told. Two nieces, both with children, two of my sons, and two friends I've known for a long time. It's funny, but writing it down now I've just realised that everything's in pairs - I'll be thinking about that now. Anyway, I think I expected people generaly to be as astonished and bewildered as I was, but it didn't go like that. Of course, I only know what they say to me, I have no idea what they discuss between them although I have suspicions. I try not to think about that because I could get paranoid about it.

It seemed almost anti-climactic. Here I am with momentous news that just shattered me and threw me into all sorts of states, and all I got was an almost 'well, cheers for telling me, and so what?'. Of course, I can't tell them 'what' when I don't know myself! The only thing I could stumble through was to suggest that if it runs in the family, and knowing how easy it is to cause horrendous damage to an undiagnosed AS person, perhaps they would re-evaluate their own kids.

I hadn't taken account of people's natural tendency to say 'there's nothing wrong with my child...'. Even now, I wonder if they prefer to think there's nothing wrong with the person they've known for a long time. Either that, or they now have to think about how they've talked about me before. All my life, people have called me names and accused me of being all sorts of bad person, and now I still don't know what, but I know why. There's no reason why people who know me would be any different to those other people

I don't think there's anything 'wrong' with me either, I just think I live in a world that diasables me because of who I am. I'm still trying to understand who I am.

It all gets twisty inside my head. It's like exploring a strange country without a map.

i feel relieved knowing. it explains so much and as you say, the main reason to know is for self knowledge and self understanding.

i'm not feeling the need to tell everyone, but even telling family feels strange.

had some mixed responses when my child was diagnosed. some in the family found it hard to accept. i guess i'm alittle scared that they will be the same (negative) towards me.

i guess it's all early days.

I was the same really, and everyone else I told also said it - well, you're still the you we've always known. I agreed, but I also said that if I'd ever seemed 'odd' or something, now I can explain. The best part was the things it explained for me, I found it cleared many things that had always troubled me so deeply and absorbingly - I had no idea until it was first suggested to me, about a year before my assessment. It is definitely the answer that eluded me for so long.

I only told close family,and then only because I wanted to tell them to look out for it in their own kids. Otherwise, I haven't yet found any reason to tell anyone else. If it seems important, I won't mind, I guess I'm still finding my feet and I'll have to try and work out when it might be appropriate. Could be hard, considering we don't have a sense of the appropriate!

It's made me happier with myself, and that's the main thing for me.

how did you find telling people? it seems weird saying now 'i have autism.'

i know it's always been here, it's not 'new' just now i have a name to my differences.

i can imagine it being ok saying to a new person (if relevant) who doesn't know me, but how is it received by people who have known you a while?

Hi, I'm recently diagnosed too, and I was in a strange place for a while...

Starting to get my head round it now, chatting on here helps, so, welcome

Hi and welcome to the tribe!

I hope you find this a useful and supportive place.

Electra

Be more cat.