Newbie here :)

 before he came to us his career reported Similar behaviours eg in Blackpool some silly person gave him a football he dropped it and it went into the rd carer had to take the ball for saftey and he threw a tantrum and was head butting the pavement , she reported lots of different behaviours from him, 

Yes he's in school they work well with him and he really enjoys going but he will withdraw from any sort of physical touch activities like games where you may hold hands, and he will become distress if his main teacher goes home sick he will become anxious and refuse to go to school the next day school see challenges they take him out a couple of times a week for social games and emotion Games he can just about write his name now and he's pretty obsessed with numbers ,there was an incident at school where he didnt wipe his bottom correctly and they said he could take his boxers off but they had no spares he wont of listened to the whole sentence as they bombarded him with words so any way he took them off and came home like a manic depressant he wouldn't tell me the problem until we was home and he was already correcting the issue and saying it's ok mum I'm getting new boxers now it doesn't matter but he later woke that night and was running around the landing disoriented screaming poo poo poo it was awful for me to watch so I can't imagine how it was for him ( he is very adult reliant ) and would rather be around adults than children I believe this because children are unpredictable ( he will communicate with children but he will do this by saying look what I can do and he will hit him self in the head) and as he expects they will laugh 

he is not always distressed, but it's also not hard for him to become distress he can become distressed over very small things and I struggle to understand what as actually happened, he has undiagnosed asthma and if he develops a cough in the night he will wake and be very disoriented and distressed and he will also suddenly be mute and only scream he will become distress over words that he doesn't understand so he was angry at my 3 year because she said she had £40 and he said 40 wasn't a number she was standing her ground and he became more and more angry and upset with her, he has contact with his biological dad and he knows this happens on a Saturday at our house, but also has no understanding of time scale so he will ask is it Saturday I will say no 3 more Sleeps he will then cry and there isn't much comforting I can do as he just says well he wants it to be Saturday I reasure him and cuddle him a lot but it doesn't change the facts and he doesn't deal well with them he has a visual time table and his life is very simple or at least I try to keep it that which can prove difficult I have 2 other girls that love to do spontaneous things and things that he can't cope with, and not only that the girls no exactly how to push his buttons and they are constantly in trouble for winding him it can be an absolute night mare, the teeth pulling isn't a distressed thing it's a lack of understanding older girl is loosing hers naturally and he is so literal so when she pulled a very loose tooth obviously we have been like yay well done the tooth fairy will come tonight and he's taken this literally and so sees that if he's pulled his tooth she'll come to him too so he's on with tooth nunber 4 now I've told him the tooth fairy won't come if he pulls them out he has to wait for them to fall out  

i I think my post doesn't seem clear because I've mentioned all things we've dralt with in the last 3.5yrs and so it seems a lot written down he's come along way since then he still struggles but we as a family deal with things better it doesn't change the facts but it helps he can express more than before 

Hi thanks for reply I don't think my post is really clear I had problems posting an it either didn't post or only posted half

Hi, welcome .  Sounds like everyone's having a tough time of it.  Could you tell us if he's at school + how he's doing there?  How suitable do you think his school is for him?  Does bullying, either by his peers and/or staff take place?  Also, has he been diagnosed with anything at all (you mention his earlier days before he came to you)?  There's lots of info on this site via the posts + home page which you should have a look at to help you (working on the assumption that he is autistic, altho undiagnosed).  There's a lot to take in so take you time.  You should try to find out how autism affects him as an individual.  He sounds very distressed so you need to have a routine for him.  If he's non-verbal then you can do a pictoral time table for him.  Ask any questions you want via the posts.   Keep on at the medics etc to get a diagnosis.  Fight all the way if you believe he is autistic.  Even if he isn't, he's obviously suffering greatly so they should be able to help him + the rest of your family in some way.  

We have routine challenges, social challenges violence to others and him self, sensory and repetative behaviour rocking when he's bord running in circles he started about a year ago putting his finger so far up his nose he busts it, and he's started to pick at his skin and blemishes and scabs till he bleeds he just can't leave them, he bites his fingers when anxious and pulling his hair and ear lobes his recent thing is my older girl is losing her teeth and so he literally pulling his teeth out and the guns have healed and no big teeth are through he's gonna be teething all over again

For some reason it didn't post my whole post god I'm struggling here lol