Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello everyone my names Steven and i'm 29, i'll try to be as consise and as accurate as i can be and i'd appreciate any feed back, Thank you.
I had trouble being in School as a Child. In Primery School was branded as lasy up until Yr6 where i ended up attending some sort of centre out of School, i can't remember much of this or the feeling though i can remember the inside of my Headmasters Car whom took me there. I now know that his car at the time was a 1st model of the Rover 400 and since i have been able to identify the Stain Glass windows that i remember from that centre in can now identfy the location of this this centre as a result of passing by inprevious years.
At Secondry School i had much the same troubles and from Yr7 to Yr9 i'd moved 2 Schools. I never had any Friends and wasnt able to make any, my interest in certern subjects was quielled by peoples bulling and teachers lach of ability to see or identifiy how interested i was and most were messing about.
From leaving School i went to College and up on Leaning that they were just Teaching me at level 1 after 2 years i left feeling that this was a waste of time and they had let me down, I was under the impession that i was studing level2 after an early departure from School.
From then age of 18 i got my first job at 21 after being unemployed. My first Job was at Tesco on nights filling shelves and doing odd warehouse work while the shop was closed, after 2.5 years i left Tesco. After which i picked up a job as a Maintenance man at McDonalds near my home, id been a customer after each shift at Tesco for 2 years.
My Maintenace job by the end i was responsable of repairs to the fabric of the Building 'more than ican explain here' and contractors for specilist jobs.
I ordered the stock which was around £50,000 a month and orded the operational supplies with a budget of £800 per month though i could achive this easly in £650 per month with strict and reasonable controls and accurate proscedures
After this i started and finished my Taxi Liesence, as i thought i could learn at College and do this as its flexible.
I want to go to college to do Enginnering but worry abut my ability to be able to finish it.
Lately i have no idea whats happend or me or how to explain it, i use to be able to analise things and explain it in a logical context.
Now i feel confused, working on the Taxi 'which has been a year and a half' i have no idea how to process this. it feels like to much has happened i have non idea what to make of it.
I use to be able to put everything into order and now it feels like so much has happend i have no idea what to make of it.
I use to be able to anilise peoples behviour now it feels that its moving to fast for me to anilize.
Any questions Pleas ask as it helps me as much as you thanks Steven...
Hi Marjorie195 and thank you for your reply.
Excuse the lateish responce i've been thinking quite abit.
Since first visiting the access team my social worker has took me to a 9-5 residential care that help you with your money and get you a place on your own in which you can live inderpendantly.
I can't get my head around it, where i am isn't brilliant but getting a flat on £73 a week with bills is that possable? There is loads of hobbies i'd love to do how could i even afford to do them?
I've always worked most has been partime and alot on my conditions 'it seems' looking for a way forward seems almost impossable, atleast in a fulltime sence. When i look back i've almost ended up in fights with former staff and managers at times when there ways are illogical and not for the cause. It seems daft now don't know how i got so far.
The social worker and access team seem nice but i can't help thinking that they are trying to treat me for an emotional problem, they keep trying to reasure me but its time to think that i need.
The Dr at the access team during the coversation said 'you won't be a fan of chaos theorey then'? I said whats that? Responce that everything in the universe is and event of randomeness. This is impossable, everything has or must have a patternthey are only so many events that can possably occur, if they happen again it will be in a form of the and previous there for emerges a pattern.
I had a feeling i should wright stuff down too but it never seems to put my mind in the same place as when i've writtern it, just looks like words on paper. Though through doing this in the past i have been able to explain stuff though it hasn't ment exactly the same to me as when i have writtern it.
Thank you Marjorie195 for your response it all helps with the confusion and kind reguards steven