Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, I am new to the site and am looking for any advice on how to deal with my 11 year old son's meltdowns!
At the end of last year we had an Ed Psych assessment which showed that he has a high liklihood of Aspergers and a severe Seperation Anxiety Disorder. I have many problems getting him into school some days as using the school toilets is a massive issue for him along with the bus journey, changing from lesson to lesson, time in the playground with friends, using the school canteen, everything generally!
At home, he has many meltdowns and just today has begun to be very physical with me, pushing me and hitting me too. Today he was damaging my radiator with a toy car and when I took the car away he became violent.
He has been referred to CAMHS and they met on Monday this week to decide if they are going to take him on or not. I am at the end of my tether. I try to stay really calm and leave him to 'play out' the meltdown as interaction seems to aggravate him, but today nothing worked. He didnt want to do anything with me, didnt want me even in the same room as him, then when I went off to do something else, that wasnt right either! How do other people manage it?
He can also be very aggravating to his younger brother who is 8 and also seems to have the same 'symptoms' and to be honest it is hard work trying to keep them tolerating each other as one comment from one sets the other one off!!!
Does anyone have any suggestions that may help please?
Thanks
How do you deal with meltdowns? With great difficulty for ALL concerned. Is there any chance you can talk to him about meltdowns and how it feels when he is calm? Can you work together to help him identify when they are about to happen and strategies to reduce the impact when they are unavoidable?
It could be that if school is the main stressor then getting him to do something physical but something he enjoys as soon as he gets home might help. Alternatively an enjoyable but calming activity might help. It depends on him. As soon as you find something that helps, build this into his routine so it is something he just does.