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How to Make Friends and Get Back Out There

チラチラ
2 months ago

Hi everyone.

I'm new here and not sure how to navigate just yet. I have no experience using forums, but thought since I'm having such a terrible time connecting with people IRL, there is quite literally nothing to lose.

My name is Hallow, I'm 29 years old and a non-binary bean - they/she (please ask my pronouns). I'm  into all things animated. Cartoons, anime, animated films, etc. I'm generally a creative person and enjoy just about any hobby or activity that involves creating: drawing (digital and traditional), painting, jewellery making, baking & cooking, etc.

Since my self- diagnosis just over a year ago,  my life kinda fell apart and I've been on the journey of seeking diagnosis for my Autism & ADHD, while managing my comorbidities. I lost all my "friends" and family and became very isolated (mostly for my own safely), and ended up moving to a whole new city by myself. 

I find that my experience has made me so much more reluctant to put myelf out there in the way that I used to. I also know that the way I approach things like human interactions is vastly different now.

Soo, I want to try something new. I've heard so many people say how they've made some great friends online on Reddit or Tumblr or some other site I've always felt too intimidated to use. Well, if there's anywhere that I can be my full Autistic self and not feel 'wrong' or 'other' it's NAS, right?

Like I said, there's quite literally nothing to lose, but hopefully I'll gain some meaningful interactions,

dare I say.... even friends? EyesJoy

Has anyone got any tips for coming out of isolation in your late 20s/30s?

Or any age?

Or just want to say "Hi"?

I hope to chat with you all Blue heartPurple heartGreen heart

Parents
  • 2 months ago

    I can see you're a creatively driven person. You've moved to a new city, but I wonder what kind of friends you're looking for? What kind of traits do you value in a person, that you couldn't find from your previous friends and family?

    I enjoy anime and cartoons, and I graduated college for animation. I've been a lead in printing, and a certified braille transcriptionist. I just study things on my spare time. I drew for a number of years, but my interests have evolved into other areas over time. 

    I've fallen out with friends, mainly because of me getting carried away by my personal interests, that they feel ignored by me and get angry at me. So I just carried on studying my personal interests, and hoped they found someone else. 

    I am not really into the pronoun thing, as I seen a few too many concerning things that made me uncomfortable. I never prized my identity much. I'd much rather have skills and knowledge and the ability to do things, rather than concentrate on what I look like, or what I want other people to address me by. What I look like doesn't matter. My race and gender doesn't matter. It's what I can do, and my capabilities as a person, that matters.  

    I hope you do find some friends who you can talk to about things. Isolation is a worrisome state to be in, so I'm glad you're reaching out to try and find some friends. Having some socialization is important. I wish you the best of luck. 

Reply
  • 2 months ago

    I can see you're a creatively driven person. You've moved to a new city, but I wonder what kind of friends you're looking for? What kind of traits do you value in a person, that you couldn't find from your previous friends and family?

    I enjoy anime and cartoons, and I graduated college for animation. I've been a lead in printing, and a certified braille transcriptionist. I just study things on my spare time. I drew for a number of years, but my interests have evolved into other areas over time. 

    I've fallen out with friends, mainly because of me getting carried away by my personal interests, that they feel ignored by me and get angry at me. So I just carried on studying my personal interests, and hoped they found someone else. 

    I am not really into the pronoun thing, as I seen a few too many concerning things that made me uncomfortable. I never prized my identity much. I'd much rather have skills and knowledge and the ability to do things, rather than concentrate on what I look like, or what I want other people to address me by. What I look like doesn't matter. My race and gender doesn't matter. It's what I can do, and my capabilities as a person, that matters.  

    I hope you do find some friends who you can talk to about things. Isolation is a worrisome state to be in, so I'm glad you're reaching out to try and find some friends. Having some socialization is important. I wish you the best of luck. 

Children
  • 2 months ago in reply to Hullabaloo

    Hullabaloo,

    Can you tell me more about how you got into printing and being a braille transcriptionist, that really fascinates me and sounds like a brilliant job!  Very intriguing!

    I'm glad you mentioned about the pronouns thing as I felt uncomfortable with it when I went to a Queer event.  The introductions of yourself included name, why you came to the group and your pronouns.  It's something I'd never considered about myself as like you, I'm just me.  It's one of the things about the evolving LGBTQIA+ community that tires and confuses me....