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Feeling overwhelmed and abandoned by recent diagnosis

SnrDiggan
over 1 year ago

Hi Everyone,

I am a 43 year old man who has just been diagnosed with high functioning Autism.

Following my diagnosis I have struggled to process the news. Don't get me wrong I was sure I had it but now it's official I seem to have more questions and anger than I did before. In the two weeks since diagnosis it has been a rollercoaster of emotions. I have laughed more than I have in ages but I have also had to call 999 because I felt suicidal (I'm fine now).

There is either very little support, or I cannot find it, for me between diagnosis and being taken on by my local ASD service.

I feel that I am still going alone through this and no-one is helping me through this incredibly hard time of transition and acceptance. My wife has described it as me going through the 5 stages of grief:

- denial
- anger
- bargaining
- depression
- acceptance

Can anyone help point me in the right direction or give me a good starting point. I'm not sure what I want, I guess I want someone to help me avoid taking the long route to understanding, accepting and working with my condition. I don't know the best people to turn to for advice and support.

Any help is greatly appreciated.

  • over 1 year ago

    Hi SnrDiggan, I'm sorry I don't specifically have information on the best way to get the support you need as I'm also trying to work this out myself but the fact you are here asking for help is a good start I reckon! I'm 49 and just been diagnosed a few days ago so I'm in a similar situation. It's going to take time to process the news and we are bound to go through all sorts of emotions in the process. For me it's realising that being vulnerable due to social difficulties has made me a target for bullies in the past that's made me angry. Don't be too hard on yourself and remember you are still the same person you were before but now we have the chance to understand ourselves better.

  • over 1 year ago

    I, too, felt on my own after my assessment (which was at the Lorna Wing Centre). By the end of the assessment, I was too exhausted to ask any questions and would need time for processing before I could think of any anyway. So I, strongly, feel that an assessment should include a follow up session to look at the implications and impact of the diagnosis  - where to go from there.

    Like Iain, I presently found an online counsellor who has helped me to explore things.

  • over 1 year ago
    SnrDiggan said:
    Can anyone help point me in the right direction or give me a good starting point.

    Hello SnrDiggan, welcom to the club.

    I'm in my mid 50s and diagnosed 2 years ago and have been on a similar journey.

    To answer your question - get yourself a therapist if you can possibly afford one. They cost £40 to 50 an hour typically and they are great to process this stage of your journey and come to terms with its significance.

    They can also teach you ways to cope with the changes and "unpack" or deal with the decades of trauma that have got you to where you are today.

    Maybe start with looking for one here:

    https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/counselling/england?category=autism

    That is where I found mine and she has been tremendous in helping me understand, accept and embrace my autism.

    For more specific issues or general questions, try searching on this forum (the magnifying glass on the top right) or posting on the subject - there are plenty of posters who know their stuff and others who can discuss their experiences and coping mechanisms.