Hello all, my ASD assessment is coming up soon!! What to expect?

Glad you finally got some clarification, Rich. It's a relief to know. Looks like you didn't have to read the stupid flying frog book either! 

I would say first should be finding out about Double Empathy Problem www.youtube.com/watch

Maybe a weird word to use given your tears, but congratulations :-) - Yes, there's no 'cure', but you are as you were meant to be. And knowing must be such a relief.

So I attended the assessment this morning, deciding to go on my own having thought that my family member who’s known me since birth might be surprised by some of the revelations I was going to reveal about bullying, etc. 

An hour or so of me banging on and deviating from the original questions, as you do, then sent out of the room for ten minutes, and it was confirmed on the way back in that not only did I show a diagnosis for autism, but that I should consider going to my GP for antidepressants for anxiety and low mood. 

It was only that the stairs down to the reception area to the exit door of the building was full of people that stopped me from bursting into tears. 48 years of knowing, yet not knowing.  It’s also the first time that I’ve been diagnosed with anything, knowing there’s no cure.

Not sure what to do next.  But I will say that the assessment centre, and all staff were nice and clearly understood that they see people who need help. 

I knew exactly what to expect by way of a diagnosis, but it still felt shocking. I didn’t want it to be true, but I already knew it was. I didn’t want to be autistic, and then I felt relief. Then I cried. Then I out it out of my mind. All in a matter of seconds lol.

In time, I’ve adjusted. I’ve just got on with things. I do exactly as I please, and I don’t do things becuase other people want me to. I still don’t like that I am not good at certain things, but I’ve been honing in on the things I can do well, which takes my mind off the rest. 

You'll quickly find out the world continues to revolve the same as before, after all we are not the centre of the universe.

As well as there is no help for adult autistics, GPs would happily sticker you with mentally unsound stamp, and pump up with pills, nothing more. 

Pills are bad for us in majority of cases

Reasonable adjustments is the only actual benefit we can get, it depends though on your workplace, to many ableists in charge and you should rather stay quiet than mention diagnosis

But then there is fun in putting the pieces of the past in a new light of diagnosis together, and chatting with other autistic about all the crazy/insane/superinteresting/unimaginable stuff that we do/imagine/experience now and then

I've recently been through it myself, and can confirm all of the emotions you menfioned and then some.  I was so stressed about it that affected my health physically and I took the last 3 days of term off work.

Nothing changes, but everything changes.  It's a relief to finally know, but it takes time to adjust to the realisation that these struggles are not something that are just going to go away if I try hard enough.  That I am disabled, whether by my own shortcomings or by society, and that there will always be gaps between my experience and that of the people around me.

And I looked through my report and immediately fixated on it.  I'm trying to remind myself that bit of paper doesn't define me. 

I am still the same person, and I now have my membership certificate for the autistic club.  But the things that I enjoy and the things that have helped me and the people that support me are all still there too.  And there are so many people out there going through the same things, posting advice online.  

I'm no longer an outsider, I've found my community and my home.

No problem at all, Rich.

Exactly, they have to make it thorough and pick us apart. Just be yourself though – it’s not like you have to ‘pass’ anything.

Hope all goes well and definitely let me know how it goes.

Thank you so very much Andrew for your comprehensive response, and do not apologise for the length as this is the sort of thing I and I’m sure many here would appreciate….as much information and detail as possible about people’s life stories as this has got us to where we are now and why we’re here on this forum. 

I particularly liked the reassurance you give about the embarrassment of the assessment and describing it as ‘being part of it’.  A little pain now will be for the long-term benefit. 

On your advice I will continue to write thoughts and experiences down, I have submitted 20 A4 pages already as part of the initial questionnaire but will come up with more situations and experiences to help with the assessment. 

I’ll let you know how I get on. 

Hi Rich,

I felt the same whilst going through my diagnosis. Depressed, anxious, angry, and agitated. To be honest – I don’t feel much different now! A diagnosis can help you understand yourself/past experiences and allows you to explain yourself to others. Therefore, it is beneficial to have one. I needed to know for sure and have it in writing before I could move on with my life.

However, don’t expect much else to change. There’s no support post-report; you just have to get on with things. It does make me feel sad sometimes. I was a quiet/creative kid but completely changed when I was a teenager. I abused alcohol to get through social situations well into my thirties; suffered mental health issues/suicide attempts; had tons of terrible jobs and have now ended up isolated.

I sometimes wonder if things would have been different with an early diagnosis. No point wondering though I guess.
I’m now 41 and about to start my second degree. I’ve reverted to my quiet/creative five-year-old self!

Anyway, I did a similar thing to you – saw a psychologist first and discussed all my current issues. She agreed I may be autistic and told me I should have a full assessment. I then booked a private assessment with a clinical psychologist/autism expert. I also sent them a list of traits I’d had since childhood that were autism related. I did this as I was worried I would ‘freeze’ under assessment. There were also some forms for me and a family member to fill in.

Next, I had a 90-minute interview with a psychologist and discussed my entire life; there’s lots of focus on childhood. Next, a parent had a 90-minute interview with the psychologist to discuss my childhood/current traits etc. Finally, I had an observational assessment with two psychologists. This involved social tasks and improvising. I hated it, and found it embarrassing but guess that’s part of it! I then had a follow-up appointment to discuss the outcome. Anyway, the whole process took about three weeks.

I then received a 37-page report – stating that I am autistic. It felt good to get some clarification!

My advice is to write things down and bring them to your appointments. Tell them as much as you can.

Sorry for the life story by the way; it’s easy to get carried away when writing!

Good luck and if you have any questions feel free to ask.

Andrew