Hello all, my ASD assessment is coming up soon!! What to expect?

I would say first should be finding out about Double Empathy Problem www.youtube.com/watch

Maybe a weird word to use given your tears, but congratulations :-) - Yes, there's no 'cure', but you are as you were meant to be. And knowing must be such a relief.

So I attended the assessment this morning, deciding to go on my own having thought that my family member who’s known me since birth might be surprised by some of the revelations I was going to reveal about bullying, etc. 

An hour or so of me banging on and deviating from the original questions, as you do, then sent out of the room for ten minutes, and it was confirmed on the way back in that not only did I show a diagnosis for autism, but that I should consider going to my GP for antidepressants for anxiety and low mood. 

It was only that the stairs down to the reception area to the exit door of the building was full of people that stopped me from bursting into tears. 48 years of knowing, yet not knowing.  It’s also the first time that I’ve been diagnosed with anything, knowing there’s no cure.

Not sure what to do next.  But I will say that the assessment centre, and all staff were nice and clearly understood that they see people who need help. 

I knew exactly what to expect by way of a diagnosis, but it still felt shocking. I didn’t want it to be true, but I already knew it was. I didn’t want to be autistic, and then I felt relief. Then I cried. Then I out it out of my mind. All in a matter of seconds lol.

In time, I’ve adjusted. I’ve just got on with things. I do exactly as I please, and I don’t do things becuase other people want me to. I still don’t like that I am not good at certain things, but I’ve been honing in on the things I can do well, which takes my mind off the rest. 

You'll quickly find out the world continues to revolve the same as before, after all we are not the centre of the universe.

As well as there is no help for adult autistics, GPs would happily sticker you with mentally unsound stamp, and pump up with pills, nothing more. 

Pills are bad for us in majority of cases

Reasonable adjustments is the only actual benefit we can get, it depends though on your workplace, to many ableists in charge and you should rather stay quiet than mention diagnosis

But then there is fun in putting the pieces of the past in a new light of diagnosis together, and chatting with other autistic about all the crazy/insane/superinteresting/unimaginable stuff that we do/imagine/experience now and then

I've recently been through it myself, and can confirm all of the emotions you menfioned and then some.  I was so stressed about it that affected my health physically and I took the last 3 days of term off work.

Nothing changes, but everything changes.  It's a relief to finally know, but it takes time to adjust to the realisation that these struggles are not something that are just going to go away if I try hard enough.  That I am disabled, whether by my own shortcomings or by society, and that there will always be gaps between my experience and that of the people around me.

And I looked through my report and immediately fixated on it.  I'm trying to remind myself that bit of paper doesn't define me. 

I am still the same person, and I now have my membership certificate for the autistic club.  But the things that I enjoy and the things that have helped me and the people that support me are all still there too.  And there are so many people out there going through the same things, posting advice online.  

I'm no longer an outsider, I've found my community and my home.