Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm new, thought I'd just say hello to you all.
I'm still awaiting an official autism diagnosis, I'm on the NHS waiting list for an assessment, but there's a 3 year waiting list, I'm on it.
I've only recently looked for an diagnosis, now I'm 54. Yet I didn't really consider myself to be autistic until fairly recently, as everyone's normal is different. I don't think an official diagnosis would be life changing for me, but it would be nice to put that final piece of jigsaw in place.
It's only been over these last few days that I've actually spoken openly about it. It's just something I've carried with me all of my life, hidden it within the best way that i can, as no doubt a lot of us try to do.
After browsing a few posts on here, It's certainly helped and I can see a collation between myself & others on here.
I'm booked in to see my GP in 3 weeks and will start the diagnosis journey from there. I am lucky that I may be able to afford a private diagnosis if I want to, but I'm not really sure what happens thereafter.
After being in denial for a few months, I've now acknowledged that I probably am on the spectrum. I'm struggling to come to terms with it, and who I am, but at least I'm now more aware of why I behave in a certain way (e.g. suddenly having an excessive angry outburst with my wife / kids). This means that I now know the problem is me, not them, and I can apologise rather than thinking I'm right.
Anyway, I digress. My question is: what has everyone done with their diagnosis? Has this led to counselling / coaching via the NHS? Are other services available after a diagnosis? Or, is it just that having an "official" awareness makes it easier to make adjustments yourself?
I'm not diagnosed but it got picked up via the mental health team. Good in one way as i got referrered eventually (still waiting). Not so much in others. There is no support. Not had any since.
The good thing is.....my wife read up on it. Rather than just thinking I was a bit of a divvy sometimes when things got too much (I can be in other ways, my behavior isnt all autism but alot is triggered by sensory stuff.....Im very laid back otherwise)
Just helped me to relax and not be on edge if i was feeling nervous. Beforehand, i didnt know what was happening, why i didnt understand what things meant and pretending to. I can sort of explain things now, or at least try. Also, my family know there is a reason why I sometimes want to be alone and know i need that space to gather myself.