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Hello all.

Phoenixboy
over 1 year ago

I'm new, thought I'd just say hello to you all.

I'm still awaiting an official autism diagnosis, I'm on the NHS waiting list for an assessment, but there's a 3 year waiting list, I'm on it. 

I've only recently looked for an diagnosis, now I'm 54. Yet I didn't really consider myself to be autistic until fairly recently, as everyone's normal is different. I don't think an official diagnosis would be life changing for me, but it would be nice to put that final piece of jigsaw in place. 

It's only been over these last few days that I've actually spoken openly about it. It's just something I've carried with me all of my life, hidden it within the best way that i can, as no doubt a lot of us try to do.

After browsing a few posts on here, It's certainly helped and I can see a collation between myself & others on here. 

Parents
  • over 1 year ago

    I'm booked in to see my GP in 3 weeks and will start the diagnosis journey from there. I am lucky that I may be able to afford a private diagnosis if I want to, but I'm not really sure what happens thereafter.

    After being in denial for a few months, I've now acknowledged that I probably am on the spectrum. I'm struggling to come to terms with it, and who I am, but at least I'm now more aware of why I behave in a certain way (e.g. suddenly having an excessive angry outburst with my wife / kids). This means that I now know the problem is me, not them, and I can apologise rather than thinking I'm right.

    Anyway, I digress. My question is: what has everyone done with their diagnosis? Has this led to counselling / coaching via the NHS? Are other services available after a diagnosis? Or, is it just that having an "official" awareness makes it easier to make adjustments yourself?

  • over 1 year ago in reply to Paul Ornott

    Hi, I think that anger seemed to be my default setting. I do wish that I had an assessment 20 years ago, I think I would possibly have been a much better parent. I use coping skills now and I explained to my sons what had actually been going on. I really don’t know why my wife stayed with me. I tend now to realise when a situation is going wrong  and get out, from experience it’s only going to get worse so don’t fight it, take some time out. I don’t yet have an official diagnosis but know that I am autistic. You gradually find out what works for you. I think the expression is ‘ fight or flight’ I try now to control a meltdown more into a shutdown, which I can control better.

Reply
  • over 1 year ago in reply to Paul Ornott

    Hi, I think that anger seemed to be my default setting. I do wish that I had an assessment 20 years ago, I think I would possibly have been a much better parent. I use coping skills now and I explained to my sons what had actually been going on. I really don’t know why my wife stayed with me. I tend now to realise when a situation is going wrong  and get out, from experience it’s only going to get worse so don’t fight it, take some time out. I don’t yet have an official diagnosis but know that I am autistic. You gradually find out what works for you. I think the expression is ‘ fight or flight’ I try now to control a meltdown more into a shutdown, which I can control better.

Children
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