Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi I’m new here and looking for some advice my son who is 12 has just been given his diagnoses after nearly 3 years on the cdact waiting list, also the wait before his actual assessments and observations before going into the cdact list do it’s been a while before reaching this stage! He understands that he was assessed but he’s very much things are black or white, yes or no so refused to accept there was a possibility he’s autistic but now we have his diagnoses I’m worried how to tell him, I know he’ll always remember the day he was told so I want to get it as right as I can though I know sometimes there’s no right or wrong way but I just feel it’s really important I can explain as best I can. We’ve always known deep down and it’s been more prominent as the years have gone on. He’s at a really tricky age trying to identify himself trying to express himself and just become a teenager he has a lot going on in his wee head as it is, he with anxiety issues he has a lot of facial and vocal twitches/ticks he can get very loud though hates loud noise unless he’s making it, he is going through a lot at school now he’s at high school with bulling it’s been awful for him but lo always be his voice, stand up for him and be his biggest supporter
! If anyone has any advice on something to say and not to say to make it more comfortable I’d be really grateful :)
thank you xx
Don’t you think it’s likely that he partly realises already being as he’s gone through the whole assessment process?! Have to you not discussed the possibility of him being autistic at all during this period of time?
Hi yes he does partly realise we e been open about it all along just great wasn’t very accepting of any of it he was completely closed off to the idea and would shut me down and want to chat about it he’s very much needs a yes or no answer to things not a maybe and possibly but he seemed to take it in his stride far better than I thought he would, ive tried to explain better in the response above, I suffer with anxiety and think I was just overthinking it all a bit xx
I’m glad that it’s going well by the sound of it
I quite understand - as parents we do tend to obsess over doing the right thing for our children - it’s only natural I suppose! As an Autistic parent of two autistic son’s I think that when you’ve watched them struggle with school etc you do end up feeling quite paranoid about anything that will add to their distress in any way. I hope your son finds the diagnosis helpful to him in many ways. Best of luck !
Thank you yes we definitely over worry He doesn’t want people to know I hope in time he’s comfortable enough to let friends know but that’s completely down to him when he chooses to do that. My oldest son is dyspraxic and has no issues about letting others know, he’s 22 living away from home at uni with a lovely gf who understands him well :) anyway I’m just hoping having a diagnoses gives him some kind of comfort and reassurance because it’s never a bad thing to be unique and that extra special like having a wee super power it’s what makes him him and I’d never want to change that because he’s just amazing :) xx