Published on 12, July, 2020
This is Yan. I come from China and now study in London.
My brother is 17 years old now. He was diagnosed with autism when he was 5. My parents got crazy after that.
My mother has tried all the methods she could to cure my brother, including attending special education school, normal primary school and middle school, having Chinese medicine etc.
Meanwhile, my father accepts it and puts more attention on work to earn more money as a way to escape...
I know that the support system for Autism in the UK is much better than in China. So, I would like to learn more about supporting the Autism group and also the Autism family group in the forum. And then help improve China's autism support system.
Nice to meet you here.
Thanks a lot!
Hi Yan,
Thank you for reaching out to the forum. Your ambition to help improve the support system in China is generous, I’m grateful for it even though I don’t have Chinese heritage.
Two things come to mind. Firstly, there are a lot of harmful misconceptions about autism out there. It can come with immense gifts as well as huge challenges. Despite these challenges, autistic people don’t need to be cured. We need to be understood, valued and supported. Learn as much as you can about your brother’s needs, and find out about his strengths. Chat to other autistic people - the community here is always up for conversations, answering questions to the best of our ability, and sharing our experience of life on the spectrum. As your awareness grows, let it infuse your relationship with your brother, and let your parents learn from this, if they’re open to doing so.The second thing I would say is, look after yourself. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself to transform the system. Change takes time, and it can be exhausting if you feel you’re mostly on your own working for a cause you really care about. It sounds like your parents struggle with your brother’s difficulties. I hope that you can find the space for your needs to be recognised and met too. Take care and feel free to reach out if you have questions or would just like to chat
Hi Sphynx,
I really appreciate your words. It has comforted me a lot.
Yes, I totally agree that autistic people don't need to be cured. But it's difficult for people in China to accept. In some traditional cultures, autism is still a shame. I really wanna contribute a little to changing this misunderstanding (at least for my parents) although it's hard. I would like to start by learning about the support system in the UK and then apply this experience to writing my MA dissertation. Hopefully, my work could have some meaning.
Many many thanks to you:)