Published on 12, July, 2020
After what feels like a lifetime of Ill defined mental health problems and difficulties I’ve finally revived a diagnosis for ASD at the start of December, a few days shy of my 40th birthday. I’m finding the whole thing a little hard to get my head around and I guess it’d be good to know how long other people took to accept and adjust to their diagnosis? I spent the first month kind of ignoring it but have just started really hammering the books to understand what it means so I can maybe start understand who I am. it feels like I’ve been completely alone in this for so long that I don’t really know how to accept or understand my thoughts and feelings, my wife is amazing but I can’t really express to her how I feel as I don’t have the language. I’m relieved that I’m not just odd and a failure at life but I also feel this means that things I find difficult are never going to really be surmountable.
also starting conversations on the internet shakes me almost as much as doing so in real life which doesn’t help, thanks for reading :)
I found the diagnosis stressful and overwhelming and I'm not sure if I've adjusted to it yet and its been years. I guess the hardest thing for me is that I've got the diagnosis but that's it, no other help or support, they just left me on my own to deal with it. Still waiting to accept it and know what to do next.