Wandering if I could have an opinion on autism

Take your time with it with her. Text her about other stuff, keep the friendship going. Then you could say to her at somepoint something like, "I'm wondering what might be going on, I mentioned my autism to you but you didn't seem to pick up on it. I'm just wondering what that was about, if anything?" It may just be she was caught off guard and didn't know what to say. A friend recently told me some stuff and it looked like he was gonna cry and I didn't delve into it cos I was caught off guard but do plan to go back there when I see him. Chat to your counselor about it, it is a big feal, and is sad.

Telling people has been patchy for me. The friend above is good and takes it into account now when chatting and does see it, but was sceptical at first. One old friend that i rarely ever see was like 'of course, how come we didn't twig' and rattled of lots of traits, and also areas where autists typically struggle but i don't. One friend totally and categorically dismissed it at first but has come around and sees it now. Mostly people have barely acknowledged it and mived on, or commented 'yeah, i always thought there was so ething strange about you'. My sister was dismissive even though she'd known all my life cos i'd been diagnosed as a kid but my parents hadn't talked to me about it.

Folk are odd. They can lack skills, or capacity, or info can disrupt the friendship dynamic and contract. But do keep the friend, do go back to it, and do choose who you want to tell.

Yes I know wot u mean about being sad she was my only friend and it was a big deal telling her I've not even told my family. Its just put me off alot about saying anything in the future to anybody. My counsellor said it gud to talk but I'm not so sure now that's y I've came on here. I cant txt her cus I dont no wot to say now. 

Yeah, I've thrown it out there 2-3 times as a comment, but he never picks it up. Which is totally unlike him as normally he's very attentive to what's going on for me. So I think there's a story there. He's similar to me, but much worse shutdowns, but then finds flirting much easier and can seem quite NT there. I can imagine people having commented his dad being asperger, or his brother being autistic (which is an abusive relationship), people teasing and bullying him in school about it but that he feels he's got beyond that now, and his ex girlfriend was autistic and suffered a lot of meltdowns and other difficult behaviour. So maybe he just doesn't want to go there.

I was sad about it cos we are close and normally he's supportive and it's a big deal for me.

I've one male friend who gets it, was a lightbulb moment for him, and he spots the traits getting in my way when thinking about problems which is helpful, and laughs at times too. 

do you have any close relatives with autism or ADHD.  DId your mum ever say to u - u are different /autistic/weird   was she autistic ?

ha, another one to add to the list - i carry rubber reusable ear plugs in my pocket everywhere

see how easy i am finding these !

Hi thanks for your opinion I came up as 32 on the tests but I know what you are saying so thankyou. I'll try and engage in conversation and learn more on here. Could I ask though have you spoke to your friend since? And did you just pretend it was never mentioned? 

Sounds probable.

In some ways it doesn't matter. If you find reading stuff here helpful, then stay here, engage and learn. And if reading other stuff on autism/asperger helpful then do that.

I told my closest friend and he's said nothing about it too. My guess is he's autistic too, and he doesn't want to go there himself.

If the test was the Autism (previously Asperger) Quotient Test online then scores of 32 and above are very reliable. I read the academic paper and stats behind it which were really credible with good methodology, data sizes, etc. From memory 26-31 scores have a 86% chance of being diagnosed autustic if the person goes for an assesment.

And if you're happy enough, then don't pathologise a thing that's not negatively affecting your life. I'm mostly happy enough, but have 3-4 traits that do negatively affect me and I'm trying to learn my way around them. Otherwise i mostly laugh at my autism.

Ha ok light doesn't affect me but noises do. I hate loud noises even sweeping brushes outside(when my partner cleans outside) I cant stop from hearing the noise and they seem so loud. If I cant do something I get frustrated but I dont get angry. I get anxious if people get angry. My family is ok they dont know I've had counselling or any of my concerns. I dont think they would believe me.

make another appointment and hand your doctor an A4 page of a list of reasons why you think you are autistic. You dont have to speak.

Also hand him a letter asking to be referred to someone who can diagnosis you with autism plus other stuff.

wow, there u go, add that to your list !

ok Stim had been explained above which is great.  I thought i didnt stim until someone mentioned doodling which i do in meetings all the time 

Lorry driving / bus driving  is a very good job for autistic people and they are excellent at it 

make another appointment and hand your doctor an A4 page of a list of reasons why you think you are autistic. You dont have to speak.

Also hand him a short  letter asking to be referred to someone who can diagnosis you with autism plus other stuff.

anxiety is a major co morbid ( a disorder that appears with another disorder regularly )  of autism i went to get help i thought i had social anxiety, and came away with "clearly autistic".

do you have any close relatives with autism or ADHD.  DId your mum ever say to u - u are different /autistic/weird   was she autistic ?

as soon as u said u where  lorry driver yep repetitive job autistic like !   

BTW my nephew is autistic and always, jolly and happy I love working with him on his train sets and model aircraft 

if something really upsets you. example trying to do something practical and it doesnt work for u.   do you get into a panic/meltdown where u cant think ? My jolly nephew has had meltdowns and wrecked things in his house ( my sister told me )

are u sensitive to lights when driving and sensitive to sound eg makes u uncomfortable ? ( just 2 more autism traits )

Okay I tap. I tap my forehead or I pat my chest. Also it mainly 3 times. If I overthink or get anxious. I also rock on my feet from side to side. That one drives my partner potty though sometimes. 

It's like actions you do over and over (sometimes without realising) if you're stressed or overwhelmed. Some people rock, some people flap their hands, play with elastic bands, anything really can be a stim.

I rock, rub my feet together and roll elastic bands into spirals. I'm sure I have others but those are the ones I'm aware of.

Sorry but what is stim?

Hi yes my partner is very aware and agrees. I've been to my GP but because I get very anxious I struggle with my words and it's the anxiety he keeps concentrating on. Even though I've asked for a test. I'm not depressed believe it or not I'm actually a happy ish person. I go to work I work on my own which I enjoy. I'm a lorry driver and I love my job especially since they send me to the same places which helps alot. Thanks for replying. 

I agree with aidie. Autism is a spectrum disorder and everyone is affected differently but you are hitting a lot of the major points. 

You should approach your GP and ask about the next steps, if that's what you want. No one here is an expert so they can't officially diagnose anyone but we can support you on your diagnosis journey.

first welcome to this forum

well LJ tells something about yourself. 

do u have meltdowns or shutdowns ?

do u stim ?

From what u have said i would say yes you are autistic but it would be much better for you to go get a professional  autism assessment ask your GP to send you for an autism assessment.

DO you have any other diagnosis at moment eg anxiety depression or any other mental health related issues ?

Have u talked to your partner about you thinking you are autistic ?