Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello.. I'm new to the group and have suspected for a while that I am on the spectrum after working as an Autism Support Worker. I also have mental health problems and trying to get my voice heard is a challenge. Some of you have mentioned being passed pillar to post. My GP surgery doesn't seem to know who deals with Autism! But i finally (I think) have a referral.
I have lost jobs very quickly due to overwhelm and emotional breakdowns. I cry a lot. I struggle to cope with day to day life. Noise, bustle, people's tone of voice, thinking people are angry when they aren't, my mind going blank, not being able to multitask. I avoid people even at home with my parents. Yet I can come across as cheerful and articulate a lot of the time.
I feel my future is bleak and I will not be able to hold down a job. I am capable of much more but this thing is getting in the way.
I'm so worried i will lose my current job as a Health Care Assistant. My manager thinks because i am often upset i am not coping. She doesn't understand. The in-house trainer politely asked me if i had considered if i was autistic. I said yes and thought it was highly likely. So I put the wheels in motion.
I feel so broken and weird and frightened and confused and misunderstood. So I came here!
I only just began my journey into getting a diagnosis after thinking about my being autistic for a few years.
I dropped out of college, I've lost jobs, and my recent uni year has been a huge struggle to keep up with. I share your anxiety - I'm terrified that this pattern of not being able to cope will follow me my whole life. It's terrifying. I wish I had some good advice for you, but I at least hope that knowing you aren't alone offers some comfort!
It is actually fantastic to know that other people are having the same struggle I am. It's really isolating and makes me feel worse about myself. Thanks for sharing with me. i hope everything goes well for you.