feeling lost

Thank you for your reply since i posted last i have had the forms through for his assesment i have been told it will take a long time but its a start now. We have also had a review with the school and are trying to get him statemented for education needs he may be changing schools in the new year but we have to move home so it will be 1 step at a time lol. He has read some of the information i was send and tells he he feels better knowing that there are other children who think and feel the same as he does (he really does not know how to put into words how he has been feeling or why he does the things he does) I am also looking into the diet as well thank you for mentioning that. You all have been very helpful im not feeling quite as lost any more lol :)

Hi Emms,

I've been through similar with my son. I've spent a lot of time and money repairing our house and its' contents. I've had to lock away knives and matches. I've been a verbal and physical punchbag and the "bad parent police" have done their judging. The child and adolescent mental health team told me he had Aspergers when he was nine. They wanted to put him on medication - we refused this, I've been down that road, am still on it and we've muddled along on our own. However he's gone through something of a transformation this year - he's now 14 - and is doing really well. I'm not entirely sure why this is but I think diet has helped. He's developed an obssession with health and fitness and has cut out all "junk". He only eats home made additive free food and has replaced sweets with fresh fruit. I've always banged on about chemical additives in food as I believe they really do affect behaviour. Also he's upped his sports and exercise which is great for relieving pent up frustration. His school work is great and he's being moved up in his classes. I think my own recent diagnosis of Aspergers has helped him also - he's no longer the "only one in the world" with it and we can work through it together - blind leading the blind maybe! I now feel much more confident about our future - things can, and do improve.

Also AK im so glad you got your daughter diagnosed at last good luck xx

Thank you for your replies :) I have recieved a whole load of paperwork today so will be reading through that later and making another appointment tomurrow with the GP (good idea to see another doc i will make sure i do this time)  I spoke to his special needs teacher today from his previous school and she told me she thought he has aspergers but didnt say anything to me :/ I have been saying for years since he was a little boy there is something not quite right but dealing with a disabled daughter as well i guess he got a bit overlooked :( I also have had doctors teachers say that "its bad parenting he is a trouble maker ect" but he really is not he is the sweetest boy very helpful and loving until he looses his temper then its like a different child altogether and the emotional shut down he will sit in his bed for hours with his cover over his head he wont talk to any 1 no eye contact there is nothing at all. We know how to deal with it at home but at school they dont know how to deal with it. When he goes off at school they think its just bad behavour. He just does not know what is going on either. Again thank you for your support :)

Hi Emms

We had a similar thing with my Daughter, I had always thought that maybe she was just more of a handful than other children and I blamed myself for the fact I couldn't control her. I went to the GP when she started school at 4. She is a poo smearer and I think the anxiety of starting school was too much for her so she started she  to do it at school. I went with what I believed at the time to be a totally random list of behaviours that were of concern to me and he said that they were all traits of Aspergers. We were referred to the speech and language clininc where she had the ADOS test and they said that although she did have traits she didn't score high enough for a diagnosis. No one believed me. My husband just said she was challenging and that I wasn't dealing with her correctly, school said absolutely no way, she didn't show any signs at school at all and now the hospital had said no. I had read so much that I knew it was Aspergers. To cut a long story short I refused to give up because I KNEW I was right. Last monday she was finally diagnosed with Aspergers, and not borderline, but clearly has Aspergers. She will be 7 next month, it has been a long tough 3 years, but we got there in the end. If you think your son has an ASD then you are probably right! xx

hi again - I wd try to get a paediatrician rather than a psych to see your child.  Try another gp in your practice - they can vary considerably in their opinions.

Thank you i have read so much already its all a bit overwhelming at the moment. Having always thought "its just how he is" its always been normal for us to live with him like this but when it all started to go wrong with the school i think thats when i had to admit to myself that things were not right. Im so glad i found this site having felt like we were going through this alone i realise there is help for him at last. 

Unfortunately lots of psychiatrists still don't understand autism.  I suggest you read as much as you can from this website and also look at the NICE clinical guidelines and the autism act so you understand what is supposed to happen.  good luck, unfortunately you'll need it.

My son has been seeing a child psychiatrist for about 8 months now after being refered by his previous school she has put him on Risperidone 0.5mg daily to help with his anxiety and stress levels i have mentioned to her on more than 1 occasion about aspergers and could i get him tested she has refered him to art therapy (not too sure why) We have also spoken to his councilor and anger management therapist and spoken to my GP with no luck there either. I have been told he is just a sensitive boy or he is a trouble maker. He does not understand why he reacts like he does he can not explain why either just that it was not his fault. He is not a trouble maker and certainly does not look for trouble yes he is sensitive but then as are all my children. He is like a 4 yr old child at times its very hard to understand what is going on with him. I am waiting for some forms to come through from the people here to take to my GP to see if that will help get things moving in the right direction.

hi - could you let us know more about the problem with getting him assessed?  From your post it's clear that's what you all need.  You'll know from visiting this site that an assessment + then a sen statement can make a big difference.  If the correct support isn't in place for him at school then he'll have difficulties coping.  As you say he keeps being taken out of schools.  He'll be feeling very stressed out + that in turn affects you all.  Please post again - lots of people here to give advice.  bw