living With Asperger As I Get Older

Yes and no. I was first diagnosed two years and did find there wasn't a one-stop-shop to find strategies for things I found difficult e.g managing sensory overload. As someone who also has ADHD, I found the need to look at multiple sources and especially the over-reliance on documenting this information in book form difficult as it was hard to maintain my concentration. I've now found ways to manage my sensory needs e.g use of a gravity blanket, essential oils etc. Plus, from reading more about autism I have a greater awareness of my general needs and how to manage these, especially around socialising. My diagnosis also opened up medical support in the form of sleeping tablets, although I'm suffering from pregnancy insomnia at the minute.

From reading these boards, as well as from other autistic people I've met, I have found that there seems to be a tendency to blame everything on being autistic when it comes across that they have poor coping skills in general or they're facing the same problems that NT folk do but are blaming the issues on being ND.

It might help if you list what you're finding difficult then others could reply with what they've found helpful to overcome similar challenges?

You might also find the counselling from Action for Aspergers helpful.

I'm finding day to day life stressful my anger is getting worse and i feeling the need to lash out more (i've had a good control over it all up till this point) I'm finding myself feeling uncomfortable in my own skin if that makes sense  my anxiety levels are through the roof I'm finding that im closing off from everyone and thing, i don't know how to word the rest of what I'm feeling at the moment i don't know the words to describe it 

It sounds like you have a lot of self-awareness of what your challenges are you just need to work out a plan on how to start tackling them. From your post, it comes across as though your ability to manage anger, as well as your anxiousness,  is making you feel uncomfortable.

Anxiety is a normal reaction to many situations and as autistic people we're living in a world that wasn't designed for our way of thinking, therefore, a lot of us will always be more anxious than the average person. The best way I've found to reduce my anxieties is to excercise and eat healthily. For example, if I've had a frustrating day at work and simply sat at home ruminating about my thoughts I'd start to catastrophise, whereas, if I get in and go running it helps to clear my head so I can have a more enjoyable evening. it also helps to accept who you are. I'm due to give birth in a few weeks so am struggling to sleep, worry about leaving the iron on when I've left the house etc. In the past I'd of thought I was a failure to react like this, now I understand this is a natural reaction to a major change and a lot of people go through this.

In regards to reducing your anger and developing more healthy reactions to situations, you could look at counselling with Action for Aspergers, speak to your GP about anger management courses, read self-help books etc. 

I found the Chimp Paradox a really useful book to help me understand why our emotions work in the way they do.

It sounds like you have a lot of self-awareness of what your challenges are you just need to work out a plan on how to start tackling them. From your post, it comes across as though your ability to manage anger, as well as your anxiousness,  is making you feel uncomfortable.

Anxiety is a normal reaction to many situations and as autistic people we're living in a world that wasn't designed for our way of thinking, therefore, a lot of us will always be more anxious than the average person. The best way I've found to reduce my anxieties is to excercise and eat healthily. For example, if I've had a frustrating day at work and simply sat at home ruminating about my thoughts I'd start to catastrophise, whereas, if I get in and go running it helps to clear my head so I can have a more enjoyable evening. it also helps to accept who you are. I'm due to give birth in a few weeks so am struggling to sleep, worry about leaving the iron on when I've left the house etc. In the past I'd of thought I was a failure to react like this, now I understand this is a natural reaction to a major change and a lot of people go through this.

In regards to reducing your anger and developing more healthy reactions to situations, you could look at counselling with Action for Aspergers, speak to your GP about anger management courses, read self-help books etc. 

I found the Chimp Paradox a really useful book to help me understand why our emotions work in the way they do.