Newly diagnosed with ASD Aspergers profile this morning

I have just been diagnosed as ASC. At the assessment they mentioned having an aspergers profile but that they don't diagnose that any more. I felt similar to you, I was relieved and happy, then bitter at not being diagnosed as a child and then just didn't really know what I felt or what to feel.

I'm interested that the social skills booklet helped you. I've never had much faith in stuff like that.

Hi Binary, no, i believe that they don't diagnose Aspergers anymore. What the psychiatrist said was that she believes I am Autistic (which i think they use as an umbrella term now) but I went for the test to find out if I had Aspergers. I don't have Classic Autism as I don't have the developmental delays in language etc and I don't meet the diagnostic criteria. I assume that when I get the full report in the post in a couple of weeks it will say Aspergers profile.

Just a small topic diversion. I understand the reason for getting rid of the term Aspergers (being associated with the Nazi's and all that) but I fear that it will become a little bit like when the pop star Prince changed his name to that squiggle that nobody could pronounce, he just became known as 'the popstar formally known as prince'. Aspergers will become known as 'the autism spectrum condition formally known as Aspergers'. Unless they think of a new name for it of course.

I've been reading and working through 'Improve your social skills' by Daniel Wendler and it is AMAZING! Basically he's an American guy with Aspergers, but he wasn't diagnosed until his teens. He then studied social skills intensely for years and now writes books to help others learn social skills and does online social skills coaching too. The way he writes is really logical and easy to make sense of, his book covers everything from conversation; body language; making friends; eye contact; empathy; etc. Honestly, I'm only 3 chapters in but a few months ago before starting his book I had 3 long term friends that I'd maybe see two or three times a year, and I always felt I was being annoying (most likely droning on and on about myself) and used to get negative feedback a lot. Now I have a few more friends that I meet with regularly and I'm actually getting positive feedback for the conversations I have or the support I give other people. The hardest part at first was my own social anxiety, difficult to be confident after a lifetime of rejection. But, as I build more relationships and get more positive feedback from people my social anxiety is lessening a lot.

Have you been able to find any resources or people to support or help you?

Hi Binary, no, i believe that they don't diagnose Aspergers anymore. What the psychiatrist said was that she believes I am Autistic (which i think they use as an umbrella term now) but I went for the test to find out if I had Aspergers. I don't have Classic Autism as I don't have the developmental delays in language etc and I don't meet the diagnostic criteria. I assume that when I get the full report in the post in a couple of weeks it will say Aspergers profile.

Just a small topic diversion. I understand the reason for getting rid of the term Aspergers (being associated with the Nazi's and all that) but I fear that it will become a little bit like when the pop star Prince changed his name to that squiggle that nobody could pronounce, he just became known as 'the popstar formally known as prince'. Aspergers will become known as 'the autism spectrum condition formally known as Aspergers'. Unless they think of a new name for it of course.

I've been reading and working through 'Improve your social skills' by Daniel Wendler and it is AMAZING! Basically he's an American guy with Aspergers, but he wasn't diagnosed until his teens. He then studied social skills intensely for years and now writes books to help others learn social skills and does online social skills coaching too. The way he writes is really logical and easy to make sense of, his book covers everything from conversation; body language; making friends; eye contact; empathy; etc. Honestly, I'm only 3 chapters in but a few months ago before starting his book I had 3 long term friends that I'd maybe see two or three times a year, and I always felt I was being annoying (most likely droning on and on about myself) and used to get negative feedback a lot. Now I have a few more friends that I meet with regularly and I'm actually getting positive feedback for the conversations I have or the support I give other people. The hardest part at first was my own social anxiety, difficult to be confident after a lifetime of rejection. But, as I build more relationships and get more positive feedback from people my social anxiety is lessening a lot.

Have you been able to find any resources or people to support or help you?

Hi extraneous,

I’m pretty sure that language delay does have something to do with ASD and nothing to do with hyperlexia. I’m also hyperlexic and had no language delay. I think the confusion over whether or not Aspergers is still a diagnosis is confusing the professionals! It’s certainly confusing me! I found this link which kind of clarified it a bit: 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.spectrumnews.org/news/new-global-diagnostic-manual-mirrors-u-s-autism-criteria/amp

Basically the Uk will be abolishing the diagnosis of Aspergers and switching to an all encompassing diagnosis of Autism Spectrum disorder. I think we’re still in an in between stage at the moment with some clinicians using the updated ICD-11 diagnosis of ASD and some still using the older ICD-10 diagnosis of Aspergers/Autism/pervasive developmental disorder. Personally I got diagnosed according to ICD-10 criteria and although my assessor or assessment report didn’t specify Aspergers, the report said ‘autism spectrum disorder F84.5 according to the ICD-10’ F84.5 is Aspergers in the ICD-10. To be honest the new criteria in the ICD-11 are very vague and in my opinion they’ll be a lot more people that meet the criteria for ASD that wouldn’t have done so previously. They’ll also be people on the more severe end of the spectrum that aren’t getting a diagnosis that fully takes into account their needs. We’ll all just be ‘on the spectrum somewhere’  Like I said, just my opinion, have a look and see what you think? 

How are you feeling about your diagnosis?

That's weird, I did have language delay but they told me it was nothing to do with ASD but to do with hyperlexia. Go figure! Then they told me aspergers is no longer a diagnosis, then they gave me an aspergers diagnosis. Whatevs! I'm on the spectrum somewhere

That's really interesting. I'll definitely check it out. The only thing that bothers me about stuff like that is there are some social rules I do actually know but I still somehow can't use them. For example someone asks you a question and you ask them about themselves. I know I'm supposed to ask them in return but somehow I find myself trying to avoid any further interaction and not wanting to get into conversation. I guess maybe the anxiety takes over. I really dislike small talk so I suppose there isn't much motivation to get it right.

I haven't got into any therapy or anything. I wouldn't know where to start. Thanks for the reply.

Hi, it's really worth giving the social skills training a go, I think. I really hope the book helps you if you choose to read it. I certainly feel a lot more fulfilled as a person and a lot less restless since i've been able to start having better interactions with people and form meaningful friendships. Even this morning after my husband's cousin and his wife visited, the wife passed on later that she'd really enjoyed chatting with me. That's so new for me but it's a really good feeling to finally have people enjoying talking with me! The chapters I've done so far are on how to have conversations: how to invite the conversation partner to speak; how to inspire them to speak; the nature of reciprocal conversation (something which my very neurotypical 4 year old daughter already gets but it took me being 37 and reading a book on social skills to get!!!) and also how to make friends. One thing the author does say is that we have to accept that not everyone will want to be our friend (I guess that's true regardless of whether a person is neurotypical or neurodiverse) and I've had to remember that phrase when I've had a couple of false starts, people that said they wanted to meet again but then ignored my texts. I would have to say that those people have been in the minority though. And don't get me wrong, socialising still exhausts me, especially when it's a new person that I don't know very well then I find that afterwards I need to shut myself away/go for a walk/ go for a drive and just focus on one thing so that I can quieten my brain and stop the noise of 'did I say that right', 'could i have said that better', 'do they think i'm weird' etc. But in the big picture I just feel so much better than I used to when I was just self isolating all the time. Have you tried any other self help methods/therapy/other to help you understand or manage ASC?

You don't need to tell people until you're ready. It's your business to disclose as and when you want to. In the mean time, the people on this forum are a massive source of support and advice. I'm finding this forum really helpful, how about you?

I'm really glad that the people you work with are being helpful

He had originally said that my report would say aspergers profile but this was before he had fully read my questionnaire about early years. I was delayed with language so I'm guessing that's why he didn't put it in.

Wow. I might have to have a look. I get a lot of feedback that I am annoying. 

I haven't disclosed to people apart from here. I don't feel ready for that step just yet. There are people at work that have guessed and they understand that I can't deal with certain situations and are helpful with that.