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Undiagnosed adult siblings

NAS38885
over 6 years ago

I'm a 40 year old female who has struggled through life and always felt 'different'.  I have a suspicion that I may have some sort of Autism, and have joined this community to find out more.  I have suffered with life long anxiety and depression, as did my brother, who recently took his own life due to major depressive disorder.  He too always struggled with life, and felt deeply misunderstood, and we had spoken about the possibility of him having Aspergers.  I would really like to reach some understanding now for both of us.

Is there anyone out there who has been in a similar boat and whom could offer some advice?  

  • over 6 years ago

    Hello there. I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. You may find the work of Tanya Marshall helpful. Perhaps you could google her, she writes about what she calls Aspien women.

  • over 6 years ago

    Hi,

    Sorry to hear about your struggles and the loss of your brother. I'm male 52 and recently got my diagnosis after a lifetime of struggling to fit in, bullying and experiencing anxiety and depression. Over the last year or two I have learnt a lot about the condition and I am pretty sure both my late mother and father were also on the spectrum and possibly other family members too, it does seem to run in families.

    You have come to the right place and there are a lot of very supportive people here who I'm sure will offer their advice. Aspergers does tend present differently in women than men...although I can very closely relate to a lot of the female traits too as I'm not a very blokey bloke. This talk by Sarah Hendrickx is well worth a watch. She is an aspie herself and has done stand up comedy so its funny in parts too but the content is spot on:

    "Hiding in Plain Sight: Shining Light on Women with Asperger/Autism Profiles." March 2017
    www.youtube.com/watch

    I    t is 88 mins long though so get your feet up with a cuppa first : )

  • over 6 years ago

    Hi and welcome. I’m a lot older and always knew I was different. Trying to find a strategy to manage my depression now. Recently diagnosed ASD and that has helped. Being on this forum helps. 

    Sorry to hear about your brother. One of my brothers is undiagnosed but very strong Asperger traits. We were pre the age of diagnosis! He muddled through okay. Sorry yours didn’t. 

    There are some good books out there about Asperger’s syndrome and specifically about women on the spectrum. The most useful to me were written by women recently diagnosed at time of writing. I read a few, and did an online test. No doubt others here can give you some pointers. 

    So welcome! Stay awhile. Read. Discover. Maybe find a name?