feel as i have totally let my son down

As well as sounding unaware, she's talking rubbish.  She isn't allowed to say what a child has or doesn't have.  She's not the concultant!  And the anxiety bit, finding out what's causing it may help but if its something like noise, crowds, having demands made etc, you can't avoid them altogether.  I think I'd call and ask to speak to her manager and say you aren't happy and would like someone else.  

Stay strong.

The OT sounds like another utterly autism unaware professional...

hi dear friends thanx for all your word's, i  feel rather a bit better after talking to you all, i appreciate all  your advice it does really help me, just when i feel low i feel no one understands me but i know you all do xx   my son is statemented i had to fight for tat as they refused him 2yrs ago, he came out of mainstream schol last nov, , i ave a lot of issues with the school saying he is a politewell mannered boy and they dont see what i see!!!!  yeah rite soon a she comes home he lets it all out in front of everyone everything thats built up at school which annoed him we get it all totall meltdown screaming an shouting and hitting his siblings, but its really weird he can come out of it as quick as he went in it as if nothing has happened.... so upsetting , we had a bad night with him again last night dreaming , screaming then waking afraid but hes not awake if you know what i mean , then i had the OT  saying it isnt ASD as he s a lovely boy  and she couldnt see any other problems regarding hs global motorskill diff,  and that it was all anxietys which is causing him to react like this , she says if we find whats causing the anxietys then he wil be ok!!!!!!!  WHAT THE HELL IS SHE ON ABOUT!!!!!!  im so  stressed  i rang my sons consultant and told her what she said she was v annoyed and said she was dictating a letter off as we spoke so im expecting greif from the OT,  in my eyes she is saying he has no problems at all ...... she wants to spend time at home with us to see th son i do have   sorry for yacking on at you all xx

Patrice have you tried the Books that have been written by Tony Attwood, he is a psychologist who speialises in ASD, and he is brilliant, you may find something he has written helpful on sleep he also has lectures on youtube

Is there a possibility that you can take a break and recharge your batteries?  I know this is easier said than done when you have children generally let alone when you have one on the spectrum.  Remember you are doing a great job and your children won't be feeling as though you're letting them down.  You sound like you could do with some support yourself that could perhaps pull all the other proffessionals to work together.  Not sure if Parent Partnership does this?

I've also ordered some mohdoh for my daughter but also found recommended some Bach Gummy stars and some Bach Night drops that have good reviews.  It was almost cheaper to get three items than one with P&P on Amazon.

My heart goes out to you Patrice. I have two sons with ASD and neither sleep very well. one sixteen and the other seventeen now. One of my boys has night terrors, sleepwalks and talks in his sleep, the other gets up and comfort eats in the night or doesn't settle at all. Like you I was in despair when fighting for my sons needs. Came home from tribunal after trying to fight single-handedly for his statement and just sobbed in my failure to get all he needed. To be fair we are only human. we can only do so much and that's all. Take a step back and a deep breath and try and get some perspective. If you are anything like me it will be hard to see the wood from the trees when dealing with such an imotive issue.

If you think the regular services are not up to the job you might consider commisioning independant reports from a private OT. They don't come cheap, but they don't contain bias either. No hidden adgenda.

OT, Speach & Language, EP, all would be helpful in getting a broader picture. If the support is for a statement all information, even your own commisioned reports, will be valid. I hope this is of some help.

I suspect the reason you feel so low is that like me you have a lot to deal with. I could only manage one childs statement at a time and this led to delays in provision I felt very guilty about. Couple this with the everyday management of their needs and things will feel tough, but we are just human.

One of my boys has been prescribed melatonin to help him get to sleep, but he now has sleep Apnea so he's been taken off it. I just put out a similar post re sleep problems myself on here and someone came back with Mohdoh. I've litterally just ordered some to give it a go, as I prefer natural remedies, however, by far the best results so far for my sons have been Osteopathic treatment, particularly cranial work. It's painless and has the effect of turning the volume down so to speak. Each person responds diffrently, but it's worth a try. Find a practiciaoner who's  verse in dealing with ASD if you can.

Meanwhile try not to be so hard on yourself, you clearly have a great lad whom you love dearly. All will be right in the end, it's the journey that can be the tricky one to negotiate.

Good Luck

Coogybear

Hold on! I can't understand totally what you are going through.  I have on son with ASD, OCD, depression and he has attempted suicide.  I hit rock bottom a while a go and ended up yelling and swearing down the phone  to a very confused BT engineer, who couldn't understand why in an AS house it is can be an emergancy to be without the internet for 10 days!

The night terrors, we went through a really bad spell of those, and I found having a low level story cd going, in the background (if they will tolerate it) seemed to help.  

The school, well I could fill a novel, but what I will say is have you shown them how you are feeling, they sometimes seem to think of us as robots, and it isn't until you break down infront of them and explain that you need help now, if you can find out why they are wanting to do the assessments, then you can either produce the relevent bit of paper, if you have it or you can understand their thinking.

I won't say stay strong, I will say we are here and we do understand