My Son is so angry sometimes

When my son was arrested after being punched in the face, (he thumped him back in self defence-but as the lad complained to the police first, it was my Son who was arrested!!) Anyway, the following morning when I went to be the responsible adult, the police officer stopped me outside and said " so what is Aspergers exactly" I was gobsmacked. I don't expect the police to know every medical condition, but I thought Aspergers was fairly well known. I quickly had to explain the main symptoms before he interviewed my son.

Indeed.....there is a really worrying situation with those finishing college or university courses.

The employment situation for graduates is very variable, some finding it very difficult to get jobs after graduating. For someone affected by autism it is that much harder.

So many young people with autism who flourish during post-school education, because there is less intervention and less constricting peer relationships, and ability to manage day-to-day environment, they may do quite well - then it finishes, and so do their prospects.

For many any benefit of FE or HE qualifications is dashed.

And this sorry Government is putting a guilt complex and blame culture on disabled people over not finding work, but while it goes out of their way to undermine them, does nothing to improve the culture of workplaces that makes it so hard. Oh yes there's Disability Confident - potentially a great idea but too little too late and ill-informed, and it depends on the DWP to implement it, well that's a certainty of disaster.

And that's after meddling and reorganising compulsory education to cause much suffering to young people. Meddling to dismantle state schools, and meddling to undermine the welfare state, irresponsible meddling all the time. That's public schools for you....

Sorry .... but why am I bringing public schools into this? Well they can select and most avoid taking on disabled students. So they know least about disability.

And this Coalition Government is full of Public School Boys, who know the very least about disability and education. So why are they meddling in things they patently do not understand?

Autistic children are now entitled to educational support up to the age of 25 (http://www.autismeye.com/overhaul-of-sen-confirms-education-to-25/) but what about those who leave education before that time?

Ah well, ask NAS.....

There is a bit of a gulf between NAS (as the by product of parents groups) and NAS as a proponent of the adult autism strategy. None of us can work out for certain whether NAS understands the connection.

Between parented child and adult, there are a number of years, jokingly referred to as "transition" (which is the last thing it could be called).

Other than that local authorities are now beginning to grasp that transition is necessary, there really is a massive void between 16 and 25.

Cue for a moderator to come by and explain it to us.

There is information on the NAS webpages about autism and the "criminal justice system" - there are cards you can get through NAS which he can carry around to help explain to the plods - but don't raise you hopes too high, because when it comes to autism the plods are astonishingly slow on the uptake even by normal police standards.

But after the "swimming pool scandal" which landed the Met in a whole lot of trouble, police forces round the country MUST now receive training.

Basically the Metropolitan Police intervened when an autistic boy became stressed on the edge of a swimming pool, and despite his carer's attempts to explain the boy was double handcuffed and sat on. For that they were severely reprimanded. But whether it has sunk in everywhere remains to be seen.

Absolutely correct, its once they have left school that they need the most help and guidence. At school they have the  structure that my Son felt comfortable with. He knew where he was meant to be, at what time and what was expected of him. Once he left, he was suddenly trying to be grow up and struggling to cope with the fact that there weren't the same rules. To others the freedom was great, but my son wasn't good at making decisions and really found it hard. Add girls and alcohol when he was 18 and things go from difficult to very difficult. I have tried to explain things but he just wants to be like his friends, some of whom take advantage of his good nature.

He's been in trouble with the police twice, neither were his fault, he was just attacked outside of a club because someone knew he had issues!!!!

There needs to be something in place so they don't fall off the conveyor belt at 16 years old.

@Longman, I think you are right that there may be a significant amount of parents out there hoping for a "cure" and perhaps even in denial (until they reach that stage) that their child will need any help once they reach young adulthood.

This age limit thing with parents' groups is immensely sad. While parents' groups do a lot of good, and indeed drive national campaigning and underpin NAS, they have always been about parents rather than people with autism.

Some are supportive of those with autism, but too many are just about parents, and what the parents have to endure (autism by proxy!).

Until I moved last year I was a member of a parents group to which I paid the highest subscription which was for professional member in order to join. OK most of the time I had a professional involvement, but even after retiring the only sub available to me was professional. There was no membership available for being on the spectrum.

Consequently the children of these parents were at events as hangers on, even if older ones - there was nothing going on for them other than they came along because their parents were there.

Part of the problem is that many of these parents seem to believe that somehow there will be a magical cure at adulthood. Or maybe I'm being unfair.....

The upshot is that the predominance of parents groups in campaigning to a large extent explains the limited understanding of adults with autism.

It is why I also think "transition" is such a postcode lottery. It is only really being addressed as a sideline of Adult Autism. And in some areas it is 16, others 18, others 21.

What we've got here is a conveyor belt with nothing at the end of it. The children these parents groups SHOULD be about (notwithstanding its tough on the parents but is it REALLY only about them?) just fall off the end of the conveyor belt into a black hole.

Moreover many parents groups are fiercely anti adult diagnosis.

So what are parents groups all about? Despite their fundamental campaigning role, I'm still tempted to say that they are mostly for grumpy, miserable, self-centred NTs who's common ground is they have to suffer for having kids with autism.

Big outcry yes.....but just have a look at yourselves sometime parents' groups. Who actually has this disability?

I may not have written it clearily. He was diagnosed with ADHD when he was 7 years old, before that I made sure he he was on diet free from all colours and additives. He was put on ritalin then and the change was fantastic for him. He was assessd every few months and it was during one of these sessions when he was about 13 that I thought it was more than ADHD and the doctor agreed from his symtoms it was likely to be Aspergers.

However, once he got to 16 the assessments stopped and I've struggled to get any help after that, the local Autistic society only deals with children, not young adults, which I think is when they need the most help.

We will go to the GP as soon as we can and get the ball rolling

The labels are what opens doors to services.  Without diagnoses, it's almost impossible to get support, and professionals will often do things like blame parenting for a child's behavioural issues.  Labels are very important.

I know this because I have one daughter with a diagnosis and one without (so far) which we are struggling to get.  No-one is listening to me because she doesn't have the label on a piece of paper.  I have also read enough other families' experiences to know that it's the case as well.

The thing is, perhaps with earlier supports (based on his diagnoses) your son would be less angry and not have needed medication.

A label also helps someone understand themselves.  I have read of quite a few adults that resented their parents when they found out as adults that they had known when they were little and didn't get them diagnosed.

You could speak to the GP about whether he needs a slightly higher dose or whether he needs a change of drug.

He's on Concerta 27mg which I think is fairly low.

He's agreed to go tothe doctors and get formally diagnosed, something I didn't want to do when he was younger, he'd already had enough labels. Do you think that once he's in the system he'll get more help? this is new territory for me.

Is he on medication?  If he has not ever accessed therapy to help him control his temper and if nothing else works, he might benefit from a low dose medication to keep him calmer.