Not sure how much more I can take!

hi annah, i know it feels like this diagnosis is the most important thing at the moment, but things will actually become easier when u just accept that ur daughter has difficulties, and learn some strategies to help u with that. i found that everyone saying, its probably bad behaviour because u have changed his situation, made me focus on the diagnosis. I needed to prove it wasnt my fault. i stopped listeneing to my son, and doubted wether he did have problems, or wether he was just "punishing" me! things became really bad, tense, and just horrible. then i decided to just accept the difficulties, and work with them, i listened and reasoned with my son. i picked my battles, i joined a group called concious parenting. fantastic thoughts that really make sense. for some reason, everything happened quickly after that and the diagnosis was made. but my children have been much happier since "I" became happier. i hope this helps, knowing someone else has struggled, btw my son is 10, so struggled with this for years, he also has a diagnosis of adhd xx

Thank you for replying, thank you for being understanding, just thanks!

I don't really know who to ask to give me some time out, my mum is a bit old fashioned and blinkered with regards to my daughters problems and it quite often makes her worse. My husband (not her father - who has nothing to do with her) is brilliant but he's also flagging and I don't really know who else to ask.... I suppose next week when school's back it'll give me some time off and I can get a bit of "me" time.

She's 7, I think I thought that diagnosis would have been much quicker because I suppose it just seems super important to me!

I really really really like the running suggestion, I'm going to try tomorrow - it'll be more like a walk though!

Crystal12 - please don't apologize, I'm not doing any of it yet. I'm struggling to find the will to be able to do it - I must sound so self pitying!! I just feel like I am at the end of the road, I think I let it all go on to long before asking for help. I have made a resolution to make lots of noise on Monday - I am going to call my GP, my daughters SALT, the paed office, anyone who will listen (!) and try and get things moving.

Thank you again, it has really helped for me to be able to just blurt and see that people understand xx

For uncertainty, limbo, anxiety, take action,,, any action. You are internalising the situation all it is doing is stressing you and causing anxiety and depression. You would think the NAS would assist in this matter. The last thing you need is both mother and daughter to be struggling, remember if your daughter is diagnosed, her behaviours are just poor coping strategies, so nothing to be guilt about or ashamed about,. Hang in there. Time will heal.

Hi Annah - you needn't apologise to any of us - many on here will know how you feel.  How old is your daughter?  It is totally ridiculous that you're waiting so long.  This will be taking its toll on you so you're reacting in an absolutely natural way under these circumstances.   You + your daughter are being let down by those who should be helping you.   Puzzled mum gives good advice, so although you've got lots on + are so stressed, please take her advice. You could also complain via the nhs complaints system with a copy to the Chief Executive of the nhs trust + the Councillor who'll be the Chair of the Children + Families Commitee at your local council, with a copy to the Director of that council dept as well for good measure.   It might be worth looking at the home page for info + also checking out ipsea.  Whilst waiting for your appointment you can also check out this site if you haven't already.  There's loads of info so you could get a head start on the professionals + find ways of making life better for the 2 of you.  Apologies if you're already doing this.  There was a time in the past when I nearly gave up.  I was being blocked deliberately.  In the end I persevered + it was a battle, but that's all I could do + eventually I won.  I hope things ease for the 2 of you soon.  Come back on here whenever you want.

It is such a hard thing to go through i think everyone here will agree .i hope u feel better getting it out and well done for doing that .we  all feel like we are hitting our heads off the wall the only thing that gets me through is i will do it and i will fight for my son til he can do it for him self .i too phoned everyday and what i realised quickly is write to them leave a paper trail they cant ignore you if u write they have to respond . i contacted my mp ,dr .health vistor ant one i could think of .

do u have anyone who can help you give u time out ? i always said no as i could cope with him and knew how to be with him but i was making myself ill i now let some people close to him help even for an hour . i took up running last year after saying i would do 6miles to raise awareness for autism and believe me i couldnt run but do u know what i love it i pit my music on loud and hit the roads it clears my head and its me time gud luck i hope u get answers soon xx