Not sure how much more I can take!

Hello,


Sorry this is going to be a bit of a rant I think......
I just don't know how much more I can take of it all at the moment!
My daughters been on the waiting list for an ados since June last year and it was due to be done in January.
I keep calling to check and one of the drs left and so there is a backlog and they can't tell me how much longer its going to be...
My daughter is getting worse in terms of her violence, growling, pinching, unreasonableness, difficulty etc etc and the whole time I'm waiting I feel in limbo. I've had time off work and I'm on meds because I just can't cope. I've cried every day this week and I just feel like I can't go on. I love her so much but it hurts to see her so scared of life and wondering why she has no friends and I am just so worried she'll never be happy, even I don't make her happy anymore. 
All I want to do at the moment is run away and I think I've put all my hope on this test and they might not even say she has asd!! 
Sorry. I said it would be a rant I just needed to blurt and I need someone to tell me I'm normal feeling like this, I just feel like a complete failure!!
Parents
  • Hi Annah - you needn't apologise to any of us - many on here will know how you feel.  How old is your daughter?  It is totally ridiculous that you're waiting so long.  This will be taking its toll on you so you're reacting in an absolutely natural way under these circumstances.   You + your daughter are being let down by those who should be helping you.   Puzzled mum gives good advice, so although you've got lots on + are so stressed, please take her advice. You could also complain via the nhs complaints system with a copy to the Chief Executive of the nhs trust + the Councillor who'll be the Chair of the Children + Families Commitee at your local council, with a copy to the Director of that council dept as well for good measure.   It might be worth looking at the home page for info + also checking out ipsea.  Whilst waiting for your appointment you can also check out this site if you haven't already.  There's loads of info so you could get a head start on the professionals + find ways of making life better for the 2 of you.  Apologies if you're already doing this.  There was a time in the past when I nearly gave up.  I was being blocked deliberately.  In the end I persevered + it was a battle, but that's all I could do + eventually I won.  I hope things ease for the 2 of you soon.  Come back on here whenever you want.

Reply
  • Hi Annah - you needn't apologise to any of us - many on here will know how you feel.  How old is your daughter?  It is totally ridiculous that you're waiting so long.  This will be taking its toll on you so you're reacting in an absolutely natural way under these circumstances.   You + your daughter are being let down by those who should be helping you.   Puzzled mum gives good advice, so although you've got lots on + are so stressed, please take her advice. You could also complain via the nhs complaints system with a copy to the Chief Executive of the nhs trust + the Councillor who'll be the Chair of the Children + Families Commitee at your local council, with a copy to the Director of that council dept as well for good measure.   It might be worth looking at the home page for info + also checking out ipsea.  Whilst waiting for your appointment you can also check out this site if you haven't already.  There's loads of info so you could get a head start on the professionals + find ways of making life better for the 2 of you.  Apologies if you're already doing this.  There was a time in the past when I nearly gave up.  I was being blocked deliberately.  In the end I persevered + it was a battle, but that's all I could do + eventually I won.  I hope things ease for the 2 of you soon.  Come back on here whenever you want.

Children
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