Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, I am in a long term realtionship married for over 10 years. Communication (mine) has always been as issue. I don't communicate much with my wife and have been through different therapies, first for a diagnosis of social anxiety, and a second for strategies in relationship communication. Both of these I felt helped but my wife doesn't think so.
She believes I have high functioning autism, and we have looked at some online quick assessments which would suggest this too, I am waiting for an assessment referral through my GP. However, things in our relationship have become increasingly strained during Covid, as we dont get time away from each other and so I struggle to find things to talk about.
I have been working on telling her more but often when I say something she feels I am saying something else and I am not explaining things well, Is this something that people with autism can relate to, and be a suggestion that I am on the spectrum.
I am struggling to find any help and advice, there is a lot for what other people can do to help someone with autism but I am struggling to find what I can do to help myself.
Can anyone relate or give advice?
HappyRambling,
Communication and interaction is a two way street, those of us Autistic communicate in one style, nonautistic people communicate in a different style, and it's the mismatches between the communication styles that causes the problems now known as the Double Empathy Problem.
You and your wife will need to work together, she'll have to learn how to understand you as well, not just you need to understand her.